Karaoke Family Night (More Like Every Man For Himself)
by Sweetysweetssugarytreats
Summary: "This…" Gintoki yelled above the undefined croaking, "…is Shinpachi singing!"- Or: The family enjoys spending a nice evening at the karaoke… and Hijikata has no idea what he has gotten himself into. - ['If I Could Say What I Want To Say missing piece.']
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I had planned to include this in 'If I Could Say What I Want To Say' at first, and I will, but since it's going to take a long time to get there I will now add this as a 'missing piece' instead.**

**This is how I see them once they all get together!**

**Shoutout to skyblxssom for all the family feels she has been feeding this fandom with! We all appreciate it so much and this family deserves happiness only!**

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**Chapter One**

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"Finally." Shinpachi practically sighed in awe, staring up at the big, bold sign hanging above their heads.

Because they were finally in front of Shinpachi's Heaven on Earth. Or as normal humans, and also aliens, referred to:

The karaoke.

For the past week the Yorozuya trio (Shinpachi) had put in enough elbow grease to scrape together the needed money (still Shinpachi) to spend an amazing night having fun at the karaoke (yes, this was definitely all Shinpachi).

The boy's enthusiasm, however, was not exactly shared by the other three who had come along.

Hijikata was, too, staring at the sign. He was mostly indifferent to the situation, but there was almost a sense of uncertainty inside of him that he couldn't quite place where it was coming from.

Gintoki and Kagura instead exchanged a look that from an outside perspective could pass off as dreadful.

Shinpachi turned with almost scarily bright glasse- er, eyes to the three. "What are we waiting for standing here? All those songs are not going to sing themselves!" He exclaimed with barely contained energy, practically disappearing inside.

After a moment that lasted only a few seconds instead of an eternity they followed behind the giddy boy, even if Kagura and Gintoki's steps were decidedly slower.

"Is this what you do for fun?" Hijikata asked Gintoki once they found themselves inside one of the private rooms.

Shinpachi was already messing with the microphone and karaoke player, giving the impression of having been here many times before whilst Kagura had plopped down one of the sofas and was already messing with the telephone there, most probably calling the reception to bring in more snacks. And again, it also seemed like she had done this many times before.

Gintoki took a seat beside Hijikata on the couch, who had sat next to Kagura, and they were all staring at the boy with various degrees of wariness in their expressions.

"I wish this was actually fun…" Gintoki muttered under his breath in answer.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Hijikata was about to question him again, but his next question was interrupted by Shinpachi.

"I. Am. Ready." The boy with glasses announced into the microphone, punctuating each word with a low and slightly too serious voice for what one would normally use before singing a song. It almost sounded like he was going to war.

Hijikata's eyebrows furrowed in apparent confusion, Gintoki and Kagura gulped nervously. For a moment silence reigned in the room, creating a sudden atmosphere of apprehension.

The Vice-Commander was almost startled when he felt someone place a hand on his shoulder and turning around he was even more so in finding two big and blue eyes looking at him with… sadness? Pity? Sympathy? He had no idea what that look meant.

"Mayora. Sweet, little, innocent mayora…" Kagura began in a quiet, almost trembling voice. "It was nice meeting you."

Hijikata's confusion was slowly but surely growing. "…What?"

Gintoki rested a hand on his other shoulder, looking at him in the same way. "Thanks for all the parfaits you bought me-"

"You mean the ones you _forced_ me to buy you?"

"-I'll never forget that. It was nice… spending time with you."

Hijikata frowned at them (even if there was a light dust of colour on his cheeks at Gintoki's words, but details, right?), and just when he was about to ask what these two were talking about they all distinctly heard Shinpachi clear his throat into the microphone.

Hijikata didn't know why, but he had the inkling of a bad feeling creeping up his spine as he watched Gintoki and Kagura's faces slowly morphing into an expression that in the future he would deem as… terrified.

And then Shinpachi opened his mouth.

And it all fell down.

What came out of the boy's mouth when he tried, yes, tried, to sing the first syllable of the song's lyrics was not his voice. It was… it was… well, no one knew what it was.

But it sure was scary.

_"YOUR DADDY IS *BEEEEEP*!"_

"Holy shit!" Hijikata immediately raised his hands to his ears to protect himself. "W-What is this?!"

"This…" Gintoki yelled above the undefined croaking, his hands also firmly pressed to his ears because he was kidding himself into thinking his eardrums could be saved from the inhuman sound. "…is Shinpachi singing!"

Only then did Hijikata realize… he had forgotten.

He had forgotten the impact that Shinpachi's singing voice had on human and non-human ears.

He thought back to when the Yorozuya trio had asked him to come along on their 'fun' night out. How could he have overlooked such a pivotal detail in Gintoki's plan?

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"Hijikata-San?" Shinpachi began in a cheerful, if not slightly hesitant voice. "Why don't you join us at the karaoke next week?"

Hijikata had actually been surprised by that request. Admittedly, it wasn't rare for them to all gather together. But most of their outings could be described as: being in the wrong place at the right time. (sometimes it even involved breaking a few laws and hearing Matsudaira's complaints, or having to file more paperwork the next day). So being asked so upfront was… a little unexpected.

"Yes!" Kagura immediately agreed, tugging on his jacket and jumping up and down in place as if she couldn't control her energy while also doing her best impression of puppy eyes, that in that moment Hijikata thought resembled Gintoki's ones quite a bit when he asked him for a favor. "Please! Please Toshi! Come with us!"

Hijikata had not been aware of Kagura's almost desperate glint in her eyes.

"Yeah, you definitely should. We're gonna have fun." Gintoki added with a grin, even going as far as settling his hands on his shoulders and giving him a light massage. "You always work so hard. It's nice to simply let go and have some fun for once, you know?"

Hijikata was momentarily distracted by Gintoki's closeness and by his warm, strong hands gently working his shoulders _and_ his ability to think rationally. Or think at all.

He also missed the pleading tinge to Gintoki's voice.

Shinpachi and Kagura were looking at him as if his decision to come or not could be compared to Santa Clause bringing them gifts on Christmas and he was starting to feel nervous under such scrutiny.

Thinking about it, Hijikata had no reason to say no.

After all, since he and Gintoki had gotten together- and truth be told even before then- Hijikata had started getting along with the two troublemakers, probably because the brat he had to look after was often in cahoots with the two, and also with their guardian.

And with how much time Gintoki was spending at the barracks with his men (Sougo, Kondo, Yamazaki and a few other rascals at the Shinsengumi), Hijikata thought that he could, and that he should, try and spend some more time with them too.

After all they were, as Gintoki said during his softer moments when there were only Hijikata's ears to hear his sincere words…

_Family_.

And family was still what Hijikata cherished the most to this day.

In the end he didn't find it difficult to make the decision, even though he tried to pretend there wasn't a warm feeling occupying the left side of his chest at the moment.

"Sure." He mumbled quietly in the end, looking to the side.

And a second later he found himself on the ground thanks to two teenagers and a grown man who were used to call this kind of assault a 'hug'.

But he missed the relief that passed over Gintoki and Kagura's eyes (and maybe even a glimmer of sadistic streak that if Hijikata had seen he would have been fairly sure the little girl had not acquired only from her caretaker, but also from the time she spent with the brat who tried to kill him on a daily basis).

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He should have known.

_Oh_, how he should have known!

The chickens always come home to roost.

"You traitors!" Hijikata had to shout over Shinpachi's squeaks growing in intensity, matching the heat of his glare directed at the two culprits of this unfortunate circumstance he now found himself in.

"Now, now, don't be mad Oogushi. You'd rather let us here to suffer alone?" Gintoki tried to dulcify him with gentle words and a peaceful smile.

"Yes!" Hijikata yelled without hesitation, throwing his lover's calm out the window.

Gintoki and Kagura exchanged a glance and a nod, because, yes, that was almost exactly what they were doing now.

No one likes to go through Otsuu's album if it comes out of Shinpachi's vocal cords, okay?

It was then that Kagura put a hand over her heart, a forlorn gaze already in place when she whispered the next few words with the level of wiseness and experience a girl her age rarely possessed. "All is fair in love and war."

And then she bolted out of the door as if the room was on fire.

"Every man for himself ahahah! See you later you suckers!"

Hijikata still had to get used to her abrupt changes of personality he witnessed from time to time when he was with them. Not like the Shinsengumi was any better when it came to matters like this one…

The men's mouths hung open after her retreating back.

She had made it out of here. And was now outside, tasting the sweet, polluted air of liberty. Uncaring of the fallen victims she had left behind.

"Damnit! I should have expected it!" Gintoki slammed a hand on the soft cushion of the sofa and watched as his hand jumped up again like it was on a trampoline. "…Especially after the last three times she did this."

Hijikata raised an eyebrow at the man (of his dreams). "You're letting her watch too much television."

"Letting her?" Gintoki asked back in disbelief. "She steals the remote and doesn't even let me catch up on the rerun of my favorite telenovela! I still don't know what happened to Pedro and to his wife-suddenly-turned-sister-who-is-definitely-lying!"

Hijikata rolled his eyes in exasperation, mostly because he knew exactly what Gintoki was talking about after having been dragged into his lazy ways… he had to admit though, wasting the day away on a couch with the right kind of show was almost… addicting.

There was a particular night when he forced Gintoki to watch Aliens vs Yakuza with him after being subjected to all the stupid shows the man obliged him to watch far too often for his liking, and that had been a memorable night. Probably because Sougo had scared the hell out of them with his bazooka, pretending to be an alien who had come to kill them, and the two of them, as immersed as they were, had thought everything was real. They even pretended to be the characters from the movie who had to save the world and…

Well, that's a story for another day because now was not time to think about that. Not when he saw, from the door Kagura had left slightly ajar in her betraying leave, some people and part of the staff starting to leave the risky premises of the establishment.

Shinpachi's voice was too dangerous.

"We have to leave." Hijikata commanded, automatically assuming his Vice-Chief voice in such a critical situation.

"We can't!" Gintoki's voice instead was that of a man who had already been through too much but knew he needed to stay.

Hijikata gripped his yukata, shaking him almost furiously in his attempts at driving through that thick skull that they couldn't endanger their life any longer and had get out of this hell!

Some people might have even called the two dramatic in that moment.

"Why?!"

"Think of Shinpachi's… feelings!" Gintoki grabbed his jacket, pulling him closer until they were face to face, almost nose to nose. "What is he gonna think if he sees us run out of here, huh?! He'll be sad and that sadness is gonna turn in disappointment and that disappointment will ultimately become despair and soon enough he will lose his will to work, to strive to be better, to have any interest in anything or to live at all! And soon enough he'll be begging for a few coins at the corner of the street and waste his whole life away because we didn't pay attention to his _feelings!"_ He finished in a rush, his wide eyes made him seem like a mad man as he tried to take in big gulps of breath.

Hijikata stared slightly open-mouthed.

"And the worst thing will be… at that point he won't even care if his lenses get broken. Shinpachi's spirit is inside those glasses! Do you understand the importance of this?!"

Hijikata blinked. "…Aren't you exaggerating a little?"

Gintoki pressed their noses together. His voice a mere, horrified whisper. "This is Shinpachi we are talking about."

They both turned at the same time to see the boy pouring all his soul and passion into singing the chorus of Otsuu's newest song, completely oblivious to a few of the windows cracking and the screams outside their room, he was just so terribly invested in doing what he _loved_ the most.

And Hijikata understood.

…And they were doomed.

In his moment of haze filled panic and reluctant acceptance, however, it made him smile on the inside... thinking about how much Gintoki actually cared. He was willing to go as far as putting his eardrums at risk to protect the boy's feelings (even if Hijikata still doubted Shinpachi's reaction would be _that_ drastic in case he left). But it also made his annoyance grow because instead of handling this on his own Gintoki _of course_ had to drag him into this, didn't he?

Annoyance and fondness seemed to go hand in hand whenever he thought about Gintoki, so Hijikata couldn't say he wasn't used to it.

But his capacity to think disconnected from his brain when all of a sudden a shrill, undefined sound pierced the air, so high in pitch the window on the side of the room broke.

Shinpachi had tried to reach a high note in the song.

Hijikata blinked disoriented, he swore there were suddenly three coffee tables in front of him instead of the one he had seen when he first entered. "What… what just happened?"

"Is hearing loss from one ear a thing?" Gintoki asked in a low, unsure voice, blinking rapidly in front of him. He was not faring much better, it seemed. "Because my left ear just stopped working."

Hijikata sighed, resting his head in his hands and by that point simply waiting for the end of the night (apocalypse).

Gintoki stroked his back comfortingly, although he couldn't help but be secretly pleased that he could at least share this torture with his partner. Even so there was still a small voice in the back of his head gnawing at him and he was feeling something inside that he almost suspected to be guilt.

He had a look around, searching for anything to keep them occupied until the torture finished. But, this karaoke room seemed to not offer any other comfort except for… karaoke.

"Well, we're doomed." He drew to Hijikata's same conclusion.

The Vice-Commander sighed whole-heartedly, this time letting himself fall back on the couch. Now it was the right time to think about what really mattered in his life, what he could not live without and that gave him strength to move forward even during the curve balls that life decided to throw at him.

His precious Mayonnaise.

He wondered if he would ever get to taste the richness of its flavor again after today. Maybe if he came out alive.

Chances were pretty slim though.

"But let's look at the bright side here. Everyone ran away before they asked us to pay, so at least it's free." Gintoki continued, holding his head up high. Figuratively speaking because he was sprawled on the sofa worse than Hijikata was.

"Oh, yes, because that is a very _bright_ side to look at." The officer grunted out sarcastically.

Gintoki's optimistic expression slowly became… less optimistic. "Now that I think about it, that's not exactly a bright side because I've worked my ass off this past week to pay for this."

Hijikata raised an eyebrow at him.

The samurai shrugged. "Okay, Shinpachi worked his ass off. Kagura kind of did… but I still helped them, you know?"

The men looked at each other, then let out twin tired sighs, not moving a muscle except for closing their eyes when the 'singing' became too much. Both were hoping they would melt into the soft cushions sooner or later, maybe even get swallowed up. That would certainly be a more pleasing outcome than the current one.

The couch squeaked when Gintoki moved closer. "But hey, there's another bright side."

Hijikata blinked at him tiredly. "And what is?"

"We're together."

He was almost caught off guard. When he fully turned to face Gintoki there was a smile, a genuine one to welcome him and that, coupled with the words was… well, it was sweet.

"So, do you wanna make out now?"

Of course Gintoki had to shatter the sweetness of the moment in this way.

But judging from Shinpachi's high notes -correction, what were supposed to be high notes, Hijikata couldn't blame Gintoki for searching an immediate escape to… _that_. He honestly had no idea how to refer to the boy's… thing that he did with his voice.

"...Is that going to help?" Hijikata asked with his heart pounding in his throat. From the way he did not even berate Gintoki on wanting to lock lips in what should be an inconvenient place to do so, the desperation he felt crawling inside him should have been crystal clear.

"Honestly?"

Gintoki's face was almost joyful, automatically bringing his hopes up.

"No."

But then it fell and Hijikata's hopes fell with it.

He held back a groan and hoped a hole would just open up under him and let him disappear inside, particularly when Shinpachi tried to hit what were supposed to be the… _low_ notes.

"But I really want to make out with you right now." Gintoki pressed on, the waver in his voice was almost certainly more desperation and need than want. "And it might serve as a distraction from the whale noises?"

"Is that what you call his… low notes?"

"Oh, you're right." Gintoki said apologetically. "That's offensive to whales."

Hijikata shook his head in exasperation, but he seriously took the proposition in consideration, weighing the pros and cons.

On one hand it was completely and irrevocably irresponsible to… _kiss_ in the same room as one of the kids. While said kid was singing his butt off and wanted them to be there to hear him and have a fun time at the karaoke.

On the other hand a distraction from the boy's… _noises_ currently emitting from his vocal cords was like a spiral of hope in their temporarily-turned-mad world. And well, just eyeing Gintoki's plump lips was making him have certain thoughts, and sure, it may have only been a couple of hours since their last kiss, but now they were right here and Gintoki was looking at him in that way that was so…

"Fine."

Could anyone really blame him?

Gintoki didn't need to be told twice, he scrambled on the couch to get to him, the idea of finally having something else to focus on and trying to ignore the scratching inside their ears, possibly not noticing how long it was going to take before their hearing started to deteriorate, was relieving to say the least. And of course he wanted to kiss Hijikata, any time of the day, it was probably concerning how much he always wanted to kiss him, so really, he was killing two birds with a stone here.

Or that was what he was thinking until he found a hand blocking his way to Hijikata's inviting lips.

"Wait."

Gintoki gasped in horror. "You don't want to?"

"…I want to." Hijikata gritted out, ignoring the heat flaring his face. "But not here."

Gintoki frowned, but that was definitely more of a pout. "Oh c'mon, it's not like they've never seen us kiss."

"No thanks to _you_._"_ Hijikata rasped through clenched teeth, then lowered his voice to a whisper. "I'm not… doing _that_ in front of them."

"Okay, first of all there's only Shinpachi here. And he's the mature one, he understands this kind of thing."

Hijikata gave him a _look_.

"Seriously, he's even more maturer than me."

"It's 'more mature.'" Hijikata corrected almost absent-mindedly.

"See what I'm talking about?" Gintoki insisted. "Shinpachi would have known this 'cause he's…" He paused to make his point. _"Mature_._"_

Hijikata rolled his eyes.

"And it's not like he will even notice."

Hijikata stole a glance at the boy, who was now moving his body to the rhythm of the song and in doing so he accidentally threw off the microphone stand, not even noticing it, far too immersed in his own world.

"…Still."

"Fine." Gintoki relented, but with an almost mischievous grin spreading on his lips. "Get ready to be a ninja then."

"Huh?"

"And to roll like one."

"Wha- oi!" Hijikata didn't have time to ask what Gintoki was talking about because all of a sudden he felt two hands grip him, a whoosh of air and his world literally roll around.

"Oomph!"

Hijikata thought he was the one to grunt, but it had been Gintoki, who was currently lying below him and had pillowed his fall with his body. A little more than slightly disoriented the Vice-Chief noticed they were currently behind the couch and tried to hold in his annoyance… couldn't they have walked here instead of just- just- doing whatever this idiot had done?!

"You okay?" Gintoki asked with a little grin, stroking his hand on Hijikata's back affectionately.

"I've been better." He gritted out, lifting himself up to avoid crushing his idiot- yes, _his_ idiot. But it seemed like Gintoki had other plans because he didn't let him get far.

"Don't worry, your silver knight is always here to catch you."

As much as Gintoki was trying to be sweet the implied meaning made Hijikata's eyebrow twitch in irritation. "What am I? The damsel in distress?"

"Wouldn't mind if you were." Gintoki whispered under his breath.

Hijikata pinched his cheek.

"Ow!" Gintoki caught his boyfriend's hand in his before he decided that was not enough and struck again, and put on a charming smile. "Wouldn't mind if I was, either. I don't have a problem playing the damsel in distress for you, my knight in shining armor."

Hijikata rolled his eyes, but the embarrassment was evident when he avoided holding direct contact. Gintoki's smile softened at that, his fingertips slided up Hijikata's wrist, slowly prying open his hand and feeling the warm, rough skin touching his own. Hijikata's eyes were trained on their hands, watching as Gintoki fit his fingers in the spaces between his own, with their chests steadily rising and falling against each other.

There was a hint of red splayed on his cheekbones and Gintoki felt his own face heat up, he didn't know if it was because of their closeness, or because of his heart thundering inside his chest, or if he just never would get used to be able to touch him so easily, or because of any other reason for that matter.

But whenever he was with Hijikata he always felt like his lungs could never fill with enough air, and that was still his favorite thing. As if he didn't need oxygen to breathe, but only needed him.

Of course this would be ideal if Shinpachi had not been trying to murder their ears, but at this point he would take what he could get.

"Hey, pretty thing." It was to tease him a little, but he still couldn't stop the tenderness from seeping into his voice.

Hijikata scoffed quietly. "…Shut up."

Gintoki smirked softly, sinking his other hand in his lover's hair and rubbing the red of his cheekbone with his thumb. "Make me."

Hijikata bit his lower lip and Gintoki didn't even have time to follow the tantalizing gesture with his eyes because he was already leaning down, shutting him up with a searing kiss. His hands found purchase in his collar, grasping it and trying to pull him against himself, impossibly closer.

And from there on it was a mess of lips, tangled limbs and the soft pull of silky hair, definitely a nice alternative to any distraction they might have thought of as Shinpachi's choice of songs for the night seemed to be never-ending.

"…You're so sexy when you kiss me so desperately 'cause we both know in the next half hour we're gonna die from Shinpachi's inability to sing." Gintoki sighed dazedly as soon as they came up for air.

Hijikata frowned at him, still trying to catch his breath. "…What the hell are you talking about?"

"I don't know." Gintoki answered in all honesty. "His singing is so bad it just made my brain stop processing whatever's coming out of my mouth."

"Wait. You mean your brain to mouth connection usually works?" Hijikata's insult was playful if the quirk of his lips was anything to go by.

And Gintoki smirked back. "That's below the belt, Toshi."

Hijikata didn't have the time to snort because his mouth was once again occupied by Gintoki's.

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Shinpachi was finally done.

It was clear because for one, the ear-splitting voice had ceased echoing through the now deserted walls of the establishment. And two, he was laying on the floor like a man who had had far too many drinks and was done with the life that had led up to that point. Even if he instead was just a teen who had sang his butt off to all the songs of the singer he was obsessed (in love with) until the early hours of the morning.

The boy was somewhere between the drunken scale of the slurring phase and the legless one, still able to maffle some half-broken words in between these phases.

Kagura, of course, came back as soon as it was safe enough, pretending to have been here the whole time so Shinpachi's hopes would not get crushed, sharing Gintoki's same thoughts on this.

And even after this Hijikata was still unsure if the two of them were strategically careful or simply stupidly dramatic.

While for the two samurai, they had gotten a little... lost in their task. But Gintoki had made sure they came out from behind the couch every five minutes to just… smile and wave and pretend to be engrossed in Shinpachi's 'performance'. And surprisingly it had worked.

Hijikata now eyed the 'drunk' boy. "Is he… okay?"

"Yeah, this is just Shinpachi's way of getting shit-faced." Gintoki waved a dismissive hand, apparently used to the situation. "Can you believe he gets like this without a drop of alcohol in his bloodstream?"

Hijikata stared at Shinpachi laying on the floor, glasses askew on his face, smiling, or maybe frowning?, giggling and moving like a fish out of water from time to time. "…I don't know how to answer that."

"Okay. You take him. I take her." Gintoki all but demanded as he crouched down and let Kagura hop on his back. Because whenever Shinpachi got so 'karaoke drunk' he couldn't even stand up on his own, she refused to have to use her own legs instead of being carried like him. And also because on karaoke night she usually scurried off somewhere to eat so much she could barely walk afterwards.

Hijikata eyed him warily. "Wait, why am I the one who has to take him? He's heavier."

The silver samurai's eyes were glassy, distant as he remembered the torture he had been put through. "…Because you came less damaged out of this conflict."

Hijikata wanted to point out that Gintoki did not exactly seem damaged when he tried to take off his vest. But he couldn't exactly accuse him of the action in front of the half-comatose kids now. And, well… it wasn't like Hijikata had tried to stop him either, instead aiding him in the process, also taking off Gintoki's yukata and- he stopped before he started, once again, thinking about things he should _not_ be thinking about.

The Vice-Commander sighed for probably the umpteenth time. "…If you say so."

He awkwardly tried to take hold of the uncooperative boy, but seeing Gintoki straining to haul Kagura up made him feel a little smug because he thought that maybe he was the one who was faring a bit better. Who knew how much the girl had eaten in the time she was gone? And she had seemed pretty hungry too.

They noticed quite a few broken windows as they made their way out of the building, but Gintoki and Kagura seemed to pay no heed to it and Hijikata didn't want to be the one to care about the troubles they had once again caused, he didn't have the strength for that at the moment, so he simply decided to ignore it for now.

"Otsuu-Chaaan… my looove…" Shinpachi was incoherently jabbering in his shoulder, but not singing anymore, thankfully for their and everyone else's ears.

Hijikata tried to suppress a shiver as he recalled the horrifying noises he had been forced to hear that night. He didn't know if hearing Shinpachi sing was worse than having to face Sougo's relentless bazooka.

Honestly, it was a draw.

That was probably why Sougo and Shinpachi had come to be such good friends. In Sougo's opinion, at least. Shinpachi was probably just bearing the thought of having Sougo as a 'friend'.

"It's just a phase, it will pass." Gintoki said offhandedly, nodding in Shinpachi's direction who was now rambling about 'someone's mother being an XX.'

"Keep telling yourself that." Hijikata grumbled under his breath, not having it in him to deny Gintoki of that statement, and not wanting to shatter his hopes that one day the boy might stop singing altogether and their ears would be safe and sound.

When Shinpachi cut himself off abruptly Hijikata was almost startled by the kid's direct question. "Hijikata-San?"

"…Yeah?"

"I told you… I was a good singer." The boy mumbled, sounding like a child who had just won his first football game and wanted his parents to be proud of him.

Gintoki barely hid a snort and Hijikata glared at him, but he was also trying to ask for help with his eyes because he didn't know how to answer that. His lover gave him an easy, whole-hearted smile and nodded towards Shinpachi's direction with an open expression. And that was enough to ease Hijikata of the slight tension that had taken over him.

It was almost unfair how simple it was for them to understand each other with a shared look.

Hijikata guessed that parents were usually proud of their children when they accomplished something, right? So that meant he… should be too? He didn't even know why he was thinking of himself as a parent and Shinpachi as a kid who played some sport, but tiredness didn't make him dwell too much on this either.

Hijikata had little experience when it came to this, if Sougo could even be considered as such. He supposed, in a way, the boy was his experience through parenthood, even if he had never really given Hijikata a reason to be proud.

Well, that was not completely true, Hijikata had to admit that Sougo had his moments too. But they were definitely overshadowed by the fact that the boy never gave up in his efforts to take his place, and his life. But if Hijikata had to be honest, had it not been him on the receiving end of said attacks, that might have been an admirable quality in the boy. Striving to always be better and reach your aim was always a positive trait in someone, right?

So maybe this was what Shinpachi was doing too, trying to better himself in this passion of his… right? Even if to get better at singing he had a long, long, loooooooooong road ahead of him. Very long. Did he already mention how long the road was? However Hijikata didn't need to tell him that _now_.

"A… good singer. Sure." He said in the end, thinking that this might be what the boy was looking for.

Gintoki and Kagura snickered and Hijikata narrowed his eyes at them, but both were smiling at him in a way that meant he had said the right thing. He quickly looked away before he got caught up in the moment and did something foolish like smiling back at them. He thought he had embarrassed himself enough already for the night. Or day. Since the sun was just beginning to peek out.

But when Shinpachi's arms tightened around his neck and he whispered a small 'thank you' Hijikata practically stopped breathing and searched for Gintoki's eyes, who were looking back at him with full adoration. Never mind, Hijikata was feeling so much _embarrassment_ in that moment he was probably suffering from the second-hand kind, too, but _fuck_ if that didn't make him happy then he didn't know what else would.

"Hijikata-San?" Shinpachi continued, his voice got quieter now and his reticence from when he had first asked him to join was showing.

"…Yes?"

"…Will you come to another karaoke night?"

Hijikata almost stopped in his tracks this time, it seemed like the kid would just keep shocking him with his questions. And when he looked for his lover's eyes again like he had learned to do in asking what step should he take next, he found Kagura grinning at him and Gintoki smiling that kind of smile that made Hijikata fall even more than he wanted to admit to himself. Almost unconsciously he was smiling back at them.

"Of course." He answered without hesitation this time.

The truth was that he would go through another one-hundred nights risking to bust an eardrum if it meant that they got to spend time together, carry the kids back to Gintoki's place, tease each other, smile and simply… have fun. Because, in the end, this night could almost be considered fun and Hijikata had never been so comfortable with anyone else that didn't belong to the Shinsengumi, so he thought that this was definitely worth it.

Gintoki was the one surprised by his affirmation, pausing to stare at Hijikata with wonder in his eyes. All of a sudden, with determinate strides, he walked towards him and for the second time that night took hold of his hand. Before Hijikata could utter a single word he was already leaning down and…

Gintoki kissed the back of his hand.

Just like that, in the middle of the deserted streets with the kids still definitely awake on their backs, Gintoki was showing him how he could make his whole world stop spinning with a spontaneous gesture of affection.

Needless to say Hijikata's heart went along for the ride and the race of its beat drew all the blood to his face, making him flush in 0.00001 seconds. Kagura was already snorting and even Shinpachi was giggling quietly into his shoulder, but what was infuriatingly embarrassing was the shape of a smile pressed to his hand.

"Gin-Chan is such a sap!" Kagura exclaimed with a far too energetic voice for someone who had been going in hibernation from the large quantity of food she had gobbled down.

"You said 'romantic' wrong." Gintoki corrected her. "And shut up." He continued with an unperturbed smile on his face, not even bothering anymore with the two laughing kids.

And he did not let go of Hijikata's hand. Instead he shamelessly grasped it in his own as he began to walk again, even going as far as to intertwine their fingers.

Hijikata's emotions were strewn about his head in messy and distorted waves, fighting to choose one that would prevail.

But in a moment of panic-induced-clarity, realization struck him. He was _not_ the type to be messed with, not without messing back. Give that to his competitive side that decided to make itself known in the most inconvenient times, or to his stubbornness that was present, well, whenever, no matter if it was convenient for him or not.

Hijikata squeezed his hand around Gintoki's, almost putting too much force behind the hold, which earned him the attention of the other man. He had the kind of malicious smirk playing on his lips that Gintoki would be proud of, if it had not been intended for _him_.

With his heart slamming against his ribcage Hijikata inhaled sharply, mentally preparing himself for the fatigue of uttering what would be Gintoki's downfall, the weight of it was crushing his tongue, not wanting to get out. But he had to do it. The man deserved it after all he had put him through.

And thus, it only took one word for Hijikata to win this round:

"Honey."

The effect was instantaneous.

Gintoki's face drained of colour at first, only to explode in the most vivid shade of red Hijikata had ever had the chance to witness. He took a step back, his hold on Hijikata's hand loosening as he clutched at his chest with both, falling on one knee in what was undoubtedly shock painting his face, barely able to breathe.

Shinpachi and Kagura had stopped too, staring at the scene like spectators who clapped or booed at the right joke. And then they cracked up, making Hijikata's smirk widen.

"You…" Gintoki gasped, betrayal clearly written all over his face.

Hijikata almost felt bad for pressing on one of Gintoki's weak spots. _Almost_.

"You can't do that to me!" The curly man accused with a threatening finger in his direction, unfortunately for him the effect was being ruined by his still reddened face, reason for Hijikata's growing satisfaction.

To be clear this was not his fault, Gintoki's personality might have started wiping off on him, just a little, because of how much time they spent with one another. Or maybe Hijikata had always had this malicious vein in him, but had only discovered it with the help of Gintoki. Who knew?

"You started first." Hijikata accused back calmly.

"Because it's fun seeing you flustered!"

Hijikata lost his calm. "If it's fun for you then why shouldn't it be fun for me too!?"

"Because it doesn't work like that!"

"And how the fuck does it work!?"

"You're supposed to have cute reactions!"

"W-Why am I the one supposed to have cute reactions!?"

"'Cause you're the cute one in this relationship!" Gintoki finally gave his fool-proof explanation.

Hijikata staggered, gripping at his chest too, like he not only had just received the worst insult, but a deadly hit too. "…You don't mean that."

His red eyes dared to defy him. "Oh, but I do."

The _nerve_. The _absolute_ nerve.

"Well then, if I am the _cute_ one…" Hijikata emphasized the disgusting word (no he didn't hate it, it was mostly for show) as a look of superiority crossed his face. "…why are you _blushing_ right now?"

He had done it. He had thrown gasoline to the fire and was now left to watch it burn. Literally and figuratively, because Gintoki's blush intensified. And so did the fire behind his eyes.

The air stilled and shifted, every muscle in their bodies alight with tension. Even the kids' laughter slowly decreased in volume, until there was nothing but the sound of silence echoing in their ears. And someone snoring. Which reminded them that people actually slep at this hour of the morning, but whatever.

Gintoki hung his head, his soft, silver curls fell over his face, shielding his expression from curious eyes. To others it may seem as if the aggravated man had been seriously offended.

But not to Hijikata, who was waiting for him to _snap_.

Unexpectedly, Gintoki's chuckles filled the air, freezing the presents. When he lifted his head his ruby eyes were gleaming in the sunlight, seemingly on fire. His dangerous smirk, the one that was reserved for _him_ only, spiked a rush of adrenaline through Hijikata's veins.

"Oh, _babe._ You're going down for this."

And when Gintoki leapt to his feet Hijikata was already running.

He made sure to tighten the grip on Shinpachi, least the kid fall off in their competition, and turned around only for a split second to see the other samurai hot on his heels.

Hijikata strained his muscles to run faster, any sign of fatigue forgotten as his wish to beat Gintoki now prevailed over anything else.

Sometimes they did this, when they had to make a difficult (stupid) decision and couldn't choose, or when they couldn't agree on something, or sometimes just to challenge each other: they started competitions. Which mostly involved anything and everything.

Couples were supposed to have fun, right? This was how they had fun.

"You can't escape from me!" Gintoki's voice was getting closer, automatically making goosebumps break out all over his skin.

Even if Hijikata was running, he certainly had no wish to escape from him…

The thought almost made him lose his footing and the heat to his face was not exactly caused by the sudden sprint. He huffed to himself and shook his head, choosing to ignore it for the moment.

"Go Gin-Chan!" Kagura's voice could also be heard behind them, cheering for her guardian.

"Hijikata-San! You can beat him!" Shinpachi instead rooted for him.

There was a reason why Shinpachi was his favourite, after all. What? Parents are allowed to choose a favorite kid, okay? Okay.

The two teens were making faces at each other, coming up with the most ridiculous expressions, a few of them Hijikata had often seen from his Gintoki's own repertoire.

"Oi, oi, what are we? Your pokemons?" Gintoki grumbled playfully, straining his muscles to try and surpass his rival, not exactly an easy feat given Hijikata's speed and the weight currently shouting insults at them on his own back.

They would usually be at par, but a night spent with Shinpachi's (in)ability to sing would take a toll on anyone. Even on Hijikata. And he knew because there had been a lot of competitive (stupid) races between the two of them about the most important (idiotic) reasons they had found to challenge each other with. And this time, probably the only one, Gintoki could say that both of them had already been tired from _working_. Apparently he was a little more so since, let's be honest here, he wasn't exactly used to work.

Hijikata hid a snort at his lover's words and pushed harder on his feet, suddenly swerving to his right to take a shortcut that would help him get there first.

"Oi! Not fair!" Gintoki's grunt was more distant this time and Hijikata internally smirked at the slight margin of advantage he had gained over him.

"Everything is fair in love and war!" Shinpachi called out for him.

Hijikata nodded, feeling a sense of deja-vù. "Nice one."

"Thanks." Shinpachi grinned, 'sobering up' a little.

But Hijikata's muscles were already getting sore, probably due to the fact that he had worked a full day on top of having been kept awake for almost the whole night rather than real lack of stamina. Still, he was holding his ground. Unfortunately Gintoki was far too good at holding his own too and Hijikata still wondered how the samurai could keep up- and sometimes even surpass- his speed in moments like these.

It was confusing because during these kind of races Gintoki almost had more wins than him, but when that one and only time Hijikata had suggested to go for a run in the morning the man had started sobbing pathetically and begged him not to be put through such a torture. His expression turned into a deadpan one in thinking about how they had to stop after half a mile because Gintoki was practically dying on the side of the road. Hijikata had had to buy him three parfaits to get himself out of the 'silent treatement' because Gintoki had been so upset with him for getting them to _jog_ together.

He was jerked out of his musings when he felt a hand close around his jacket. He spun around to see Gintoki's (attractive) grinning face come into view.

He tsked. "Not this time."

Hijikata came to a sudden halt, catching Gintoki off guard and consequently making him lose his balance. He took hold of his arm, enough to stabilize him so he wouldn't go spiraling down on his- and Kagura's- face. But before he could stop himself he was lightly pushing him back, enough to have a head start.

In his defence Gintoki usually did much worse to win.

"Oh c'mon!"

Hijikata almost grinned at the complaints coming from behind him, not letting his sore legs slow him down. Not now.

"You were too merciful with our enemies. They don't deserve your forgiveness." Shinpachi spoke up in a clear, and frankly dark voice. "What they truly deserve is… to be crushed by you."

And just like with Kagura, Hijikata still had to get used to Shinpachi's change of mood, definitely more rare, but probably more dangerous than hers. And he had the distinct impression that he knew exactly where this side of the boy came from, but it had nothing to do with Gintoki this time.

"You're spending too much time with Sougo." He muttered under his breath.

"What?" Shinpachi asked in picture perfect innocence.

"…Nothing."

Hijikata almost missed the way Gintoki was gradually erasing the slight distance between them and he couldn't help but agree with all those times that Otose kept calling the silver haired man a cockroach.

Shinpachi had noticed too, if the scream by his ear was anything to go by. "Hijikata-San! They're getting closer!"

"Don't worry about it." Hijikata reassured the kid, after all the night had been as hard for them as it had been for him, Shinpachi could barely stand up on his own so he thought it would make him happy if they won. He also had to admit that being competitive was a trait they both shared… well, all the four of them shared.

"Gin-Chan! Beat that mayo head!" Kagura was growling, now practically beside him.

Hijikata's eyebrow twitched. "Oi! Who did you just call mayo head?!"

She sniggered, much like Gintoki, but Hijikata couldn't focus on that. Not when they were about to surpass him. He gritted his teeth, repeating to himself he could do this. Gathering all the strength and willpower he had left inside he pushed himself harder and made for a mad dash towards victory. He was rewarded when, soon after, he saw Otose's bar in the distance.

"Haha! Eat our dirt you absolute losers!" Shinpachi mocked them, even going as far as showing them a gesture with his finger that was not exactly what one would expect out of him.

"Don't you think he's spending too much time with Soichiro-Kun?" Gintoki asked a little puzzled, but still strangely proud of the boy.

Kagura shrugged in answer.

While they were talking, Hijikata was getting closer to his win. He could almost taste the victory, all he had to do was just go up the stairs and he would arrive at the door first.

"Not so fast, Toshi-Kun."

Hijikata's breath hitched in his throat. When had Gintoki even… But he shouldn't be surprised since Gintoki was known for his surprise-factor.

It was a challenge, with both of them trudging up the stairs, and there were definitely more attempts at tripping the other than it was necessary, or fair, and not only from the two of them.

But by some sort of miracle Hijikata managed to reach the last step. Pushing himself to the limit he reached for the door when Gintoki did too, but by a mere inch he was the first to touch it. He and Shinpachi had won.

Gintoki grabbed his collar, spinning him around and Hijikata quickly put a hand on his chest, knowing that Gintoki's promise, or threat, to pay would not only result in the usual tickling attack judging from the way he was looking at him. Hijikata's eyes lowered to his lips, almost feeling their soft weight on his own.

But they couldn't right now.

"Time out!" He couldn't help the shit-eating grin though, because he now had the rights to brag about it for the next twenty-four hours… and yes, Gintoki's personality had definitely rubbed off on him. But just a little bit.

His lover stared at him for an interminable amount of seconds, Hijikata could almost read the thoughts that quickly passed over his mind, deciding on what to do. In the end it seemed they had come to the same conclusion because Gintoki let him go, huffing in resignation, even if they both knew he was not going to drop this anytime soon.

"Fine."

Gintoki hid a small smile of his own. Seeing that kind of grin break over Hijikata's face wamed it up from inside out. Seeing him be so playful, so carefree, smiling in a way that made him even more beautiful than he already was -how's that even possible?- was almost too much to handle.

They let the kids climb down their backs and both took a moment to finally catch their breath.

"You did good today." Shinpachi patted him on his head, reminding Hijikata of a child complimenting his father who had won something for him. Or just a kid praising his dog. He preferred the first option.

Still bent down, Hijikata slowly lifted one arm among the dumbfounded expressions. Then he looked up at the boy and raised a thumb up as a sign of their 'victory.'

Shinpachi's eyes sparkled behind his glasses, giving way to a huge and innocent grin as he raised his own thumb up.

Gintoki and Kagura exchanged a smile. Which turned into snickers. Soon enough those became full-blown laughter and they found themselves cackling. And Hijikata had a smile on his face he could not hide, not anymore.

Because no matter how much he told himself to resist, his heart had already lost the battle. But, he had to admit, this was a battle he didn't mind losing.

"Oh, and next time-" Gintoki's voice was loud over their cackles, and his smirk was tinted with that sadistic streak that Hijikata found so unfairly attractive.

"-we are bringing some friends."

The other three tilted their heads in confusion. "Huh?"

* * *

**. . .**

**A/N: ****CAN WE ALL APPRECIATE SHINPACHI TOGETHER?! HE DESERVES THE LOVE!**

**And yes. There is a second part, because of course I have to include Sougo, Otae and the other precious members of this enlarged and dysfunctional family in here.**


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: **_

_**I'm so sorry, this chapter was actually supposed to be up**_** months ago _but I lost the file where I'd saved it and I had to rewrite everything... sorry for the wait! ;.;_**

**_. . ._**

* * *

**Chapter Two: ...we're all gonna die.**

* * *

Hijikata knew what to expect this time… at least to a certain extent.

Once again, they found themselves in front of what would shatter all their hopes, the cause of their doom, the end of their lives as they knew it… or better known as the 'Karaoke.'

Although he noticed a few differences from the last time they were here, namely the building they were in front of. "Wait, isn't this a different one?"

"Variety is the spice of life." Gintoki recited the words boldly and wisely, raising his head to the sky with a forlorn gaze.

Hijikata side-eyed him. "…Shinpachi got banned from the last one, didn't he?"

Gintoki dropped the act and avoided his eyes as he admitted the truth with a heavy exhale. "…Yeah."

But Shinpachi didn't seem deterred by that fact, not at all. Instead he appeared even more excited than last time… if that was even possible.

"Otsuu-Chan released a new single yesterday! I have to show her my never-ending support!" The boy with glasses exclaimed as even the lenses seemed to glint with his enthusiasm.

"...Can't that support end from time to time?" Gintoki mumbled to himself, but of course Shinpachi didn't hear him.

Kagura glanced at her colleague confused, pinky stuck in her ear. "Huh? Someone explain how singing a song at the karaoke shows your support to a singer who doesn't even know you exist-"

"Let's go!" Shinpachi interrupted, of course he didn't hear her either, buzzing with energy at the prospect of singing a song from his favorite singer in the world- no, in the entire universe!

Kagura rolled her eyes and followed behind him, reluctantly, just like Gintoki. This time Hijikata definitely walked inside with far more dread than the last, imagining this was how Gintoki and Kagura must feel every time they followed Shinpachi to a karaoke parlor. But he wasn't the Shinsengumi's Vice-Commander for nothing, so he would face the danger head on… alright, maybe comparing one kid's passion to 'danger' could come off as a bit much to everyone else, but in his defense 'everyone else' didn't have to put up with Shinpachi's singing.

"I can't believe we're doing this. _Again_." Gintoki complained as he trudged behind them towards the designated room given to them, where they would wait for the end of their lives- er, where they would hear Shinpachi sing to his heart's content.

"You're the one who insisted." Hijikata told him as he took a seat on the comfortable couch, pleasantly surprised to notice an ashtray and immediately lighting up a cigarette, though he made sure to open up one of the windows before doing so.

If this night was going to go as the previous did, he would need all the help he could get. And that meant stocking up on cigarettes and mayonnaise, the absolute best combination ever created by menkind (only in his opinion).

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Gintoki waved a hand in the air while he asked Kagura to get him a parfait and a pudding, seeing as she was already ordering whatever she wanted from the phone.

Speaking of Gintoki's insistence, Hijikata only took the time to think about it now, about what the man had meant when he said he wanted to ask their friends to be here too… and understanding suddenly dawned on him like a bucket of ice cold water.

"You wanted them to suffer too, right?" He asked, mouth slightly agape at the realization.

Gintoki's (attractive) mischievous smirk was answer enough on its own. "You got that right."

Hijikata stared at him a bit incredulously, before slowly returning the smirk. "Nice."

Yes, some of Gintoki's personality was _definitely_ rubbing off on him, that much was crystal clear, but who cared anyway? At least this time his ears wouldn't be the only suffering victims in this wild battle.

But while they were waiting for Shinpachi to start, with no small amount of terror on their part, a newcomer made his way into the room. Actually, two of them did.

"Lizzy!" Kagura didn't waste time running up to them, throwing her arms around the weird, egg-ly-shaped amanto and… Katsura.

Hijikata's jaw practically dropped to the ground. He knew friends would join them, he just didn't know Katsura would be one of the aforementioned.

"…Can I have a word with you?" He whispered through gritted teeth to Gintoki as he got up, already taking the other man by the elbow and dragging him to one corner of the room.

"Toshi, please." The samurai began in an almost arrogant way. "I know I'm so irresistible you want to kiss me every minute of the day… but we're kind of in a public setting right now, you have to learn how to hold yourself back a little every now and then." He finished a bit mockingly. Only after that did he lean in to whisper. "That being said, yes, yes I want to kiss you too. Let's kiss."

"Not that you idiot." The Vice-Chief denied, quickly covering his lover's mouth with a palm before he got any closer. "What is _he_ doing here?!" He snapped, already feeling himself taking a defensive stance as his hand reached for the hilt of his sword.

"Damn, Oogushi. You're sexy when you're intimidating like this, you know?" Gintoki wiggled his eyebrows at him with a smirk, and taking hold of both his wrists before he could really do anything.

Hijikata rolled his eyes –even if there was a distinct warmth that made his face flare up as he chose to _ignore_ certain words – and turned around with an irritated sigh. "Stop joking around."

It wasn't even a second later when he could feel Gintoki's warm breath wash over the side of his neck, and his lips _almost _brushed against the shell of his ear when the man spoke next. "It's just for today."

Hijikata pretended that was _not _currently having an effect on him, and with a sliver of a biting edge to it, just to let him know he was a little pissed off, he whispered back. "You never even mentioned he was going to be _here."_

To his credit there was an apologetic flicker that passed over Gintoki's eyes when he took a moment to steal glance at him, and almost as if to mirror them his own gaze softened.

"You wouldn't have liked it?" The other man tried, his tone was back to its usual playfulness and one corner of his mouth widened in a soft grin. With both arms he encircled Hijikata's waist in a loose hold, just like he did when he tried to convince him or apologize for something, or both. "C'mon, do it for the kids. You know how much they like him."

Hijikata followed Gintoki's line of sight to see that now Shinpachi had joined the trio too, talking animatedly with Katsura while Kagura played with the giant amanto. A moment went by… and his shoulders sagged at such a clear defeat. How could he win three against one, at least not when the three were Gintoki, Shinpachi and Kagura.

Gintoki's hold tightened a bit around him as he took a small step forward, directly speaking in his ear now. "…You know that I'll make sure to make it up to you once we get back, right?" He let the words hang in the air with a soft kiss pressed to the side of his neck.

…Oh, _fine_. Hijikata couldn't (and didn't want to) do anything against the shivers crawling up his spine. He closed his eyes, only for a second, letting himself relax in the secure hold of his partner's arms. Of course he would give in just like that, just because of Gintoki, but the worst thing was probably how he wasn't even _that_ disappointed in himself for it.

Deciding he had already taken up too much time to soak up in the other samurai's presence, he finally stepped away. But not without missing Gintoki's resulting pout as he tried to cling to him for a little longer, and Hijikata's only answer was a small smirk over his shoulders once he rejoined the small group.

From the way Katsura was staring at him, it almost seemed as if he was saying: 'Giving up for such flimsy reasons, Vice-Commander? Pathetic.'

The huge amanto instead showed him one of his sings.

_'Giving in just like that?'_

Then turned the sing the other way.

_'Weakling.'_

Hijikata flushed from anger (and embarrassment). "Shut up! Both of you!"

"I didn't say anything." Katsura stated, clearly knowing what was going through his head judging from the hint of his smile.

Hijikata had learnt that Katsura's ability to read people was as skilful as Gintoki's, and that meant bad news most of the time.

Gintoki shoot his acquaintance (best friend) a flat look, and if Zura had not been Zura he would have rolled his eyes and made a snide remark, but he simply sighed and let it slide.

Hijikata was still not 100% convinced that he and Katsura being in the same room for an indeterminate amount of time would result in anything good, but one look at Gintoki's smug (and soft) grin and whatever protest he could have left in him faded away.

After he and Gintoki had grown closer, even before they started dating, the relationship between the Shinsengumi and the Joui had began to change, what with the help- that they did _not_ ask for- they received from time to time. And the Shinsengumi too had returned the favor more often than not.

Kondo had practically accepted Katsura as one of their own already, even Sougo, yes _Sougo,_ had been won over too (and Hijikata had no intention of ever finding out what it was they had bonded over, certainly not anything good). So as much as he tried to fight against him, in the end it wasn't really worth it.

Moreover, Katsura was one of Gintoki's closest friends (yes, he was, no matter how much Gintoki tried to deny it), and someone who had the samurai's _full_ _trust _deserved at least the benefit of the doubt in his books. And like Gintoki had said, it was just for one night, he could do it.

The thoughts and chatter were interrupted by a crash that sounded awfully close to where they were, eliciting a few screams from people a few rooms over. They all exchanged confused glances, piling up in the hallway to see what the ruckus was about.

Only to find another friend make his entrance, a _loud_ one at that.

"I heard there's a party going on in here, ahahah!"

Gintoki groaned and put his face in his hands with no small amount of disappointment/desperation. "Ugh, not him."

Hijikata was about to pat his shoulder in comfort, when he was somehow startled by the loud voice now very close to him.

"Tosshi! Long time no see!" Sakamoto wasted no time in showing all his friendliness and enveloping him in a hug, almost suffocating him in the process. "I missed you!"

The curly haired man was someone else the Shinsengumi had grown accustomed to, though it could be said that more often than not Sakamoto tended to cause troubles instead of fixing them. But there was no doubt he was a good man, and another one of Gintoki's trusted friends. And at least this one Hijikata actually liked. Even though he was perpetually referred to as 'Tosshi', it had happened after Sakamoto heard Kondo call him that, and immediately thought it was his name. No matter how many times Hijikata corrected him, he never really seemed to get the memo.

"Ah, Tatsuma, it's been a while-"

Before Hijikata could properly greet him, Gintoki was already getting between them.

"Hey! I saw him first!"

The Vice-Chief had to hide a small smile at that. Gintoki would get jealous so at random, and what could he say, it was cute. A little stupid, sometimes embarrassingly so, but mostly _cute_.

"Ahahah, don't worry Kintoki, I'd never even think about taking away your man. After all I've got my Mutsu-Chan here!" He pointed right behind him, where the woman was making her way to them, looking as emotionless as ever- sometimes she reminded them of Sougo. "Toshi and I are just best friends!"

"'Best friends' my ass! Who gave you the permission to be so touchy-feely with him, huh?!" But as Gintoki was trying to rip Sakamoto's arms off of _his man,_ he suddenly found himself in Hijikata's place, enveloped in one of his famous hugs- famous for being suffocating, that is. His only consolation could be that he wasn't the only one who had to endure the same fate.

Beside him, Katsura quietly 'tsk'ed in distaste. "Always so jealous…"

"Shut up Zura! No said you could butt in!" Gintoki defended himself (though he did not deny it).

"Guys! I've missed you so much!" Sakamoto gushed happily as he held them even tighter. "How long has it been already since the last time we were all together? A year? Ten years?"

"It's been a few weeks at most you dumbass!" But Gintoki's cries, and attempts to free himself, went ignored.

Because as their best friend, of course Sakamoto had the duty to shower them in all the affection he could muster, and of course that meant hugging them without holding back.

Kagura pulled at Hijikata's jacket. "Mayora, I think Gin-Chan is turning blue." She stated, not doing anything to help whatsoever.

Hijikata looked at his struggling boyfriend, nodding. "Yeah, he is." Not doing anything to help, either. (What? If he had to put up with Katsura being here then Gintoki could put up with Sakamoto's famous bone-crushing hugs.)

After an indeterminate amount of time Sakamoto deemed as 'enough' to showcase his love and appreciation, he finally let the two captives- er, dear friends go. Katsura took a step back, clearing his throat a little after the… intense hug. While Gintoki literally fell down on the floor and tried crawling away as best as he could with his hands up to his throat, breathing in big lungfuls of air as if he had been underwater for the longest time.

"Oh, look at that! The room is completely red!" Like a little kid taking in the wonders of life for the first time, Sakamoto now completely ignored his two best friends, almost stepping on Gintoki as he bounced inside the room where Shinpachi had almost immediately gone back to after the initial distraction to mess with the karaoke setup.

Gintoki glared at each person in turn, still lying on the floor. "…Okay, who the hell invited _him?"_

Katsura shrugged.

"Zura, you traitor!"

Katsura almost shook his head in distaste. "Stop being so dramatic. We all know he is your favorite friend."

"What?!" Gintoki scrambled to get up, looking at his other acquaintance (again, best friend) with horror. "That's not true! I never said that! It's not true! Not true at all!"

"Gintoki, you should avoid drinking as much." Katsura replied calmly, the faintest hint of mischievousness glinting in his eyes. "It can make you somewhat… emotional at times."

He strutted inside the room, leaving Gintoki to openly gape at his back. No, no, no, he wasn't emotional, he never got emotional! He wasn't the emotional type of drinker either, Zura was just telling a big bunch of lies!

Gintoki, still agape, turned to his lover, who simply shrugged. Grumbling, the silver haired man made his way inside too, followed by a smirking Hijikata, and everyone else. (Hijikata knew something about the 'being emotionally drunk and saying things you would never normally say out loud to your best friends', since he had been there when Gintoki had done so, but that was a story better left for another time.)

"…Red." Meanwhile Sakamoto was still admiring the wallpaper for some reason, even taking a more serious approach to the situation… well, as serious as he could get, which was sometimes _surprisingly_ serious. But not this time. "…the colour of passion…" He paused for dramatic effect. "…The colour of _love."_

"…More like the colour of blood after our eardrums explode." Gintoki stated drily, though in a low voice so Shinpachi wouldn't hear. Then snorted, finding himself amusing. "Heh that was a good one."

Hijikata shook his head. "No. It wasn't."

"You shut your mouth."

"So, why are we here?" Mutsu finally spoke up for the first time.

"Ahah, we're here to sing, remember?" Sakamoto reminded her as he slung an arm over her shoulders, laughing whole-heartedly.

"Sounds boring." She replied in a flat tone.

Gintoki looked between the two of them. "How did you even convince her to come here?"

For whoever knew her, the woman had a mostly 'no nonsense, no bullshit' policy. And no, they weren't making it up, Mutsu had hung a sign 'no nonsense, no bullshit' outside her room. She once had hung it around Sakamoto's neck too, and kicked him every time she saw the man.

Sakamoto raised his head up high, eyes fixed on the ceiling and voice brimming with confidence when he answered. "She's here because she loves me."

* * *

_Flashback to a week ago_

"Hey, Mutsu-Chan, I was wondering if you'd like to come to the karaoke with me? There's going to be Zura, and Kintoki, and Tosshi too, and the a few other friends, ahah…" Sakamoto had asked her, somewhat hesitantly if the way he was fidgeting was any indication, because he was afraid she would reject him.

"No." Mutsu rejected him without even looking up from the spaceship's control board.

"Awww c'mon!" Sakamoto forgot all about hesitation, instead stomping his foot down childishly. "Don't you want to have a fun time with the love of your life?" He even pouted for good measure and showed her his huge, round and blue eyes behind his sunglasses. A move that would no doubt sway her over! …But unfortunately for him puppy eyes were Kagura's strong suit, not his.

"No." She repeated. "And stop saying embarrassing stuff or I'm throwing you out."

He threw his head back laughing at the 'empty' threat. "Ahah, you always joke about that!"

"I never joke." She stated bored.

"There it is again, another joke!"

Mutsu took the time to roll her eyes, proceeding to ignore him.

After an increasing number of failed attempts, the man finally decided it was time to play the ace in his sleeve.

"Fine. I didn't want to do this but…" He looked straight her in the eyes with the gravelly serious kind of expression he rarely wore… and then threw himself at her feet, begging. "Please come with me Mutsu-Chan! I really want you to be there! Please, please, pleaaaase!"

She let out an annoyed sigh, trying to kick him off. "No."

But fear not, after this attempt had failed too he decided to play his other ace! Which was:

"…If you come with me I'll pay you."

Mutsu paused, blinking. "I'm in."

_End of flashback_

* * *

"Yes." Sakamoto nodded to himself. "She clearly agreed to be here because she loves me very much."

Gintoki raised an eyebrow, eyeing him skeptically. "Somehow I doubt that."

But it seemed the evening still held a few surprises, since there was no shortage of guests. And the next one to arrive was Sougo.

"Ugh…no. Not him." Hijikata quietly groaned to himself, putting his head in his hands just like the other man had done before.

Gintoki's palm was rather comforting on his back. "It's just one day."

Hijikata peeked at him through his fingers, showing him half of his resigned expression. "We're going to die."

"I mean, probably?" Gintoki replied with an initial laugh, then the cheeky upturn of his lips turned soft around the edges. "But hey, at least we're together."

Hijikata felt heat take up space in his chest, and in his cheeks, making his own lips _almost _tilt up to mirror Gintoki's. He quickly glanced away. "Stop saying things like that."

But that seemed to only spur Gintoki. "My bad, am I too sweet to handle?" He moved closer, grin a little _too_ satisfied.

Hijikata bit his lower lip to halt the sudden urge he felt to erase the distance between them (and let's be real, to keep himself from saying something equally _embarrassing _back, like, _yes, you are_). He replied with something snarling instead. "'Sweet' my ass."

Gintoki almost recoiled at that, then snorted in an exaggerated sort of way. "Almost forgot I have to remind myself I'm the romantic one in this relationship."

"That's not true." Hijikata denied hotly, as if this was another unspoken competition between the two.

And while the two lovebirds quarreled, the youngest member of the Shinsengumi was still making his entrance- well, his grand entrance.

"What are you doing here?!" Kagura jumped up at the new presence in the room, pointing at him accusingly.

"Relax China, I'm not here to pick a fight." The boy replied maturely… or as mature as someone like Sougo could be (which happened sometimes… but not today). "I am here to show my undying support for my dearest friend, Shinpachi-Kun."

Shinpachi raised his head from where he was hunched over, fiddling with the screen and the displayed lyrics as he chose what song he wanted to play. "…Wait, what?"

Instead of answering, Sougo cleared his throat and raised one hand in the air, urging the spectators to look where he was directing their gaze.

When nothing happened the boy cleared his throat again, a little louder this time.

Still nothing.

Three's apparently a charm, because after clearing his throat so loudly he even managed to startle the people inside the room, this time the windows shattered and a bunch of men clad in black literally _rolled _in, and just like cheerleaders in every chick-flick-teen-movie ever they proceeded to form a human pyramid. In a flash, they had thrown away their dark jackets, revealing underneath pristine white shirts with bold, black letters on their front. Putting the words together, the message read:

**G****O**

**SHIN **

**PACHI!**

With Sougo being the last, wearing the exclamation mark.

Most of their jaws had hit the ground, staring shell-shocked at the spectacle, Shinpachi probably the most surprised of them all.

But surprise quickly turned into full rage in Hijikata's case.

"You!" He marched up to Sougo, taking hold of his collar and making the pyramid wobble slightly. "This was the _life or death_ situation you had to work on?!"

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

_A few hours ago_

"Hijikata-San." Sougo began with grimness he rarely possessed. "I have something to do today, so I should be dismissed from work."

"No." Hijikata answered without even looking up from the papers in his hands, much like Mutsu had done with Sakamoto.

"You don't even know what I'm doing." The boy complained, though his flat voice did not exactly convey the urgency of the matter.

Hijikata took a second to glance at his insubordinate subordinate. "I don't care. Yamazaki is missing so you have to cover his shift too."

"But Hijikata-San, that's because you were chasing Zaki all over the barracks after you found out he was playing badminton. And then someone opened the door to the conference room and Zaki didn't notice it. And then he collided with it, which knocked him out on the spot. And then you told him to 'stop taking a nap and get up because we have work to do'. And then you left him there. And now you're complaining that Zaki is missing."

Sougo recounted what had happened a while ago, but of course even if he had witnessed the whole scene he had not actually done anything to help poor Zaki.

Hijikata looked up at him once more, glare set in place, then… "No. That doesn't ring any bells."

If Sougo wasn't Sougo, he would have sighed and rolled his eyes and whined to get his point across. But Sougo being Sougo, he took a few steps forward and planted himself right in front of his superior's desk, staring at him without any change of expression, which was unnerving, and speaking as monotonously as ever, which was even more unnerving.

"Hijikata-San, this is… a life or death situation." The boy narrowed his eyes a sliver, his voice still sounding very much robot-like. "You wouldn't understand."

Hijikata scoffed. "What are you, a teenager that complains nobody ever understand what he's going through?"

Sougo nodded. "Yes."

"Shut up."

After a moment of silence, in which the boy tried to silently get his point across, and failed since Hijikata was too busy doing paperwork, Sougo let out the smallest exhale that could have almost passed for a disappointed sigh. "I didn't want to have to resort to this, but you forced my hand Hijikata-San."

"What are you talking about-"

But Hijikata didn't even have time to finish the sentence when, after a small _'beep'_, the room seemed to explode in a cloud of smoke.

"Sooougo! You damn brat!"

But Sougo was long gone. Hijikata had no idea if the boy's flair for the dramatics, which kept increasing as time went by, had something to do with Kondo, or Gintoki.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

And now Sougo, keeping a blank face, answered in his usually emotionless voice. "Exactly."

"You little shit!" Hijikata didn't waste any time in trying to choke him, completely destroying the human pyramid.

Instead of trying to do something to stop the situation, the other occupants of the room stood in a semi-circle, commenting.

"Someone's been watching High School Musical, ahah!" Sakamoto spoke first, observing the little 'squad' Sougo had put together as a cheer for Shinpachi to… well, sing?

"Why do you say that?" Gintoki huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. "You know, not everyone is as obsessed as you are when it comes to childish movies."

"Ahahah, I wouldn't expect someone like you to understand anyway." The light-hearted way Sakamoto said the words had a subtle edge to it, as if he was blaming Gintoki in a way, and in a lower voice he uttered. "But everyone knows the second movie is way better."

"Listen here you_ moron!_ Everyone knows the first movie is a classic and it shouldn't even be put in the same category as the other two!" Gintoki's calm flew out the window, obviously proving that he was just as obsessed with those 'childish movies', if not more than Sakamoto.

While Mutsu stood indifferent, Katsura and Kagura watched on as Hijikata tried to choke Sougo to death and Gintoki tried to choke a laughing Sakamoto into admitting he was wrong.

"What a bunch of a-holes." Kagura finally said through her mouthful of whatever delicious treats she had been brought by the staff.

Katsura nodded wisely. "I agree, Leader."

Even Mutsu gave a small nod.

* * *

"Hello everyone, sorry for the-" Otae stopped in her tracks when she took in the current state of the room. "…What happened here?"

People looked at each other, as if exchanging personal information with one another, then simultaneously answered with a shake of their heads. "Nothing."

She quickly made her way to a dishevelled Gintoki and an even more dishevelled Hijikata. "Did he already… start?" It was clear from her frightened tone that she knew just how bad the consequences of Shinpachi's voice were.

But the men shook their heads once again.

"Nah, you're on time." Gintoki reassured her.

"…Dammit." Otae hung her head gloomily.

Apparently, she had purposefully waited more than necessary to get here, but her plan to avoid the worst of the hit had not worked since the recent 'events' had distracted Shinpachi from beginning his screami- er, singing session.

Fortunately, or unfortunately for who was there, more people began to make their entrance, filling up the room with laughter, chatter and overall a friendly and cozy atmosphere-

No, not these people.

"Otaeeeee-Chaaaaaan!"

Otae got out of the way just as a shadow dove in for her, falling to the ground in a messy heap.

"…Otae-Chaaan!" But he didn't seem deterred as he jumped up, grinning at her as excitedly as ever.

Otae was the one to groan into her hands this time. "…Not him."

Gintoki patted her shoulder comfortingly.

Hijikata shook his head at his Commander.

"Otae-Chan." A new, quieter voice said her name soon after.

"Kyu-Chan!" The brunette exclaimed happily as she made her way to her friend.

Kondo was the one who groaned into his hands this time. "…Ugh, not him."

Hijikata patted his shoulder comfortingly.

Gintoki shook his head at the Gorilla.

"You wanted all the fun to yourselves, you rascals." Otose stepped in next and graced them with a disapproving glare, firmly believing they had started the party without her.

Gintoki quietly cursed to himself, she had found out. He had in fact not wanted to invite the older woman, but only because her singing skills were… matched by Shinpachi only.

"…If you can call this 'fun.'" He muttered in response, already feeling shivers of horror crawling up his spine, because if Shinpachi and Otose decided to have a duet… Oh Kami-Sama and all the Gods and Goddesses above, if that happened then… then… he didn't even want to think about the possibility!

Hijikata elbowed him (gently).

"I mean, yes, this is always so…" Gintoki averted his dead-fish eyes, hiding the pure terror in them at the prospect of the next few hours. "...fun."

"Where's the drinks at?" Catherine asked, appearing right behind Otose. She soon made her way over to Kagura and snatched up a few of the snacks from the table. The little girl shrieked and tried to 'take back what was rightfully hers!'.

"Good evening." Tama bowed respectfully, also making her way in after the two women.

"Oh, Tama-Chan! You're here too!" Otae greeted her with a happy smile as she went to stand beside her friend.

Tama smiled at her and nodded. "I am here for emotional support."

"For them or for us?" Gintoki mumbled sarcastically, almost unconsciously raising his hands up to his ears.

Again, Hijikata lightly jabbed him on the arm, reading the subtle insult towards Otose's voice even though Gintoki had not said so out loud. He and Otose had actually grown closer with time and their interactions felt almost like watching mother and son. Or mother and son-in-law. (Gintoki tried to hide a smile at the thought of him and Hijikata married…_woah_, better not go there or the daydreams would never _ever_ stop.)

It was then that the silver-haired samurai noticed a peculiar detail regarding his mother figure. "Old hag…what the hell are you wearing?" He didn't mean to be rude, really, but that was not what women Otose's… age should wear. And here they berated him for being a man-child, apparently there was someone else who wanted to share his inner peter pan dreams.

Otose raised her chin up high, a gesture that came off as haughty, proudly wearing what appeared to be a colourful and sparkly attire clearly meant to be worn by performers, especially due to the… shortness of the skirt. "This, you _brat,_ is what the most talented and gifted singers wore back in my day."

"You mean back in the day when dinosaurs lived?" Kagura asked innocently from the headlock Catherine had managed to put her in. Even the cat-lady nodded, agreeing.

"You inconsiderate little shits! How old do you think I am!"

"A million years?" Kagura asked back, still innocently blinking her round eyes.

"Haaah!?" Otose practically went up in flames at the jab. "Catherine! Get her!"

"I'm not doing your dirty work for you, damn granny! I'm already trying to steal food here!"

Kagura gaped at her. "So you admit you were trying to steal, aru!"

"How dare you disrespect the kind soul who pays your salary?!"

"You didn't pay me this month!"

"Because you drank all your money!"

Catherine took a second to ponder over the words and remember how, during the span of the last few days, she had spent some money on drinks, then didn't spend any money drinking freely… freely because the drinks belonged to unhappy patrons who had already paid for them. And how later Otose had chased her away with a broom, not unlike an angry owner chasing away a cat trying to steal from her.

Catherine shook her head. "No, it doesn't ring any bells."

"You good-for-nothing moron! One of you is already enough to deal with!"

"Hey!" Gintoki exclaimed offended.

"Sorry I'm late!" Yamazaki poked his head in next, interrupting with an apologetic smile as he walked through the door.

"You invited him too?" Gintoki asked surprised.

"Yes." Hijikata nodded. Then quickly shook his head and quieter, he added. "Nah, he was just hanging around when I was making plans with Kondo-San about today."

Yamazaki, who heard everything because his superior had not even bothered with lowering his voice _that _much, turned the other way as silent rivers of tears streamed down his face. "…I'm always so underappreciated!"

But unexpectedly for the unlucky Shinsengumi subordinate, he was suddenly approached by an angelic vision- oh no, wait, it was Tama. But for Yamazaki, Tama and angelic visions went hand-in-hand, and speaking of that-

"Oh, are you here for emotional support too?" Tama gently took Yamazaki's hands in hers, a gesture that showed her gratefulness towards such a noble act. A small and bright smile lit up her face. "Let's do our best."

Yamazaki practically short-circuited.

Oh, and he also fainted. Again.

"Jimmy-Kun really does like her." Gintoki commented, absolutely doing nothing to help poor Yamazaki lying on the floor.

"This is not the time to be sleeping, Yamazaki!" Hijikata shouted at his subordinate, also doing absolutely nothing to help poor Yamazaki, instead berating him for it.

But poor Zaki didn't hear anything except for the pounding of his heart in his temples, and he didn't see anything except for white and bright spots dancing behind his closed lids, making him smile in bliss.

Sougo spared one glance towards Yamazaki, drawling in boredom. "Should we call an ambulance?"

"Nah, he'll be fine!" Kondo waved a dismissive hand in the air, laughing loudly and already focusing on the girl of his dreams.

Sougo shrugged.

.

.

.

.

.

Meanwhile Elizabeth was entertaining people, sort of.

_'A bitch can sing.'_

The amanto showed the sign, pointing to himself.

"Elizabeth!" Katsura reprimanded his trusted companion, just like a mother hearing her young daughter curse for the first time would do. "I told you to never use that kind of language!"

Elizabeth was already pulling out another sign.

_'A bitch can use whatever language a bitch wants.'_

"Please, forgive this inexcusable behaviour. Right now Elizabeth is going through the rebellious stage in the dreaded teenage years." Katsura explained to them as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

"That-" Hijikata pointed at the amanto, utterly confused. "-is a teen?"

"No, that's a whole grown ass man in a costume. But Zura's delusional and through trials and errors we've learnt it's better for everyone to feed into his delusion rather than fight it." Gintoki answered in a hushed voice, so Katsura wouldn't hear him.

Hijikata opened his mouth to say something… but then thought better of it. He had definitely gone through weirder stuff in his life.

"Oh, it's such a relief Shin-Chan has never crossed a rebellious phase like this one." Otae sighed, hand over her heart at the thought of her sweet teen brother… sweet teen brother who was about to bust their eardrums.

Gintoki frowned at her. "Wait, don't tell me you also believe that thing is going through puberty?"

Otae ignored him.

Elizabeth didn't waste much time in trying to push Shinpachi away, who pushed right back, fighting for the microphone and the song's choice.

"Elizabeth, wait, you can't sing _that kind of song_ here-" But Katsura's concerned cries went unheard and ignored.

_'A bitch can do whatever a bitch wants.'_

Sakamoto whistled. "Damn, sister."

"Don't praise such vulgarity, you're only feeding into this rebellious phase!" Katsura reprimanded his friend too.

Gintoki watched the scene with a disappointed shake of the head, speaking out, but it was almost as if he was narrating a story to an invisible audience. "For some reason I always thought I'd be the delusional one in a group people. Then I met Zura."

"Stop it!" Otose's voice rang clear from across the room as she made her way to the fighting 'teens'. Not only the two, but everyone else did as told, thinking that she would be the voice of reason, the mature one to end the dispute and-

"There is no need to fight since I will obviously be the one to sing the first song." The woman declared self-assuredly.

"Whaaaat?!"

"Whacha talkin' about you ugly hag, I'm the one who gets the first round!" Catherine, taking advantage of Shinpachi and Elizabeth's stunned silence (not like it was something new for the amanto), swerved right in to steal the mic from them.

"Who did you call an 'ugly hag'?! Have you looked at yourself in the mirror or did you break that too?!"

Catherine's outraged gasp was overshadowed by the _thump_ her body made when Otose dove right in. Then one thing led to another, and a fight broke out.

Now, seeing as the room was filled with enough people to support Shinpachi (well, not exactly 'support', half of these people wanted to scream their lungs out themselves), Kagura took advantage of such an opportunity served on a silver platter.

She was in her make it or break it moment, ready to dash out of here and never look back, fly on the wings of a new horizon and spare unnecessary heartache that her poor, poor eardrums couldn't endure anymore (at least until the next time they had to do this all over again).

But this time… she found an obstacle in her path. Standing before her was a boulder, a barricade she couldn't climb over, a hindrance she couldn't avoid, and unfortunately for her this made her escape…not that _escapable_.

"Move!" She roared at her captor.

But her captor, who was none other than her boss, didn't. "Oh no, you're not going anywhere this time."

"But Gin-Chan!" Kagura pouted up at him cutely.

"Nuh-uh, that's not going to work with me, missy." Mostly because he was partially covering his eyes since Kagura's puppy ones were dangerous– dangerous for his empty wallet, that is.

She huffed and her pout deepened, stomping her feet on the floor. "Gin-Chan! I have to go before-" The girl chanced a look behind her, where Shinpachi, thanks to his love and _passion_ for singing, was having the upper hand. "-before _that_ happens!"

"Do you, now?" He asked rhetorically, a slow smirk crawling up his lips. "But if you go, I wonder what would happen to your precious…" His eyes almost glinted with a mean spark. "…sukonbu?"

Kagura took a frightened step back, a hand flying over her mouth as if to shelter herself from such an awful outcome. "…You wouldn't dare."

Gintoki's shoulders lifted in an easy shrug. "Someone once told me 'all is fair in love and war.'"

Kagura's gasp almost echoed in the room as fake tears sprung to her eyes. "You… you monster!"

Gintoki grinned wickedly at his apparent win. Today she wouldn't be able to sneak away, he had decided they would all collectively suffer and so be it.

"You're cruel!"

"And what does that make _you?_ Huh? How many times have you left me to fend off for myself in this battle!?"

Kagura shrugged. "I learnt from you."

He couldn't deny that. "You sure did, young lady."

"What are they doing?" Mutsu asked from the other side of the room, still bored.

"They have a knack for being dramatic." Katsura said, as if he had never lowered himself to a _dramatic act_ in his entire life. "Ignore them."

Mutsu wasn't listening, she was already ignoring everyone and everything.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

It didn't come as _surprising_ exactly when Shinpachi managed to win the brawl. Everyone else was now sat in the comfortable couches, some awaiting their fate, some hatching a plan in their mind to hoard the karaoke the next chance they got, and all of them actively choosing to ignore the disarrayed state the room was in and s passed out Yamazaki somewhere in there.

Shinpachi smiled at them with the microphone in hand, eyes already shining with barely contained glee. He shot a grin to Gintoki and Kagura, who both gave him a thumb up… the trembling in their hands was almost noticeable.

"Gin-Chan… we're gonna die." Kagura muttered through gritted teeth, maintaining her wide grin while Shinpachi's focus was on them.

"If we die now a special place will be waiting just for us in heaven, that's the ultimate prize for enduring that monstrosity he calls a voice!" Gintoki whispered-yelled back, a thin sheen of sweat glinting over the line of his brow already conveyed his terror. "Think about all the angelic free food that's gonna be there!"

Kagura tried her best to think of all the angelic food, before hell broke loose on their eardrums.

But it seemed as if nothing in the world would ever be able to prepare them to Shinpachi… once he started to sing.

"…Holy shit." Catherine was the first to break, after the first note no less, crumbling to the floor and covering up her cat ears from the terrorizing wails. "W-What kinda black magic is this!?"

Shinpachi's singing sounded like something between a giraffe screaming and a dying ket pottle, and he wasn't even putting in _real_ _effort_ yet.

Gintoki snorted, trying to resist the urge to rip his own ears out. "If I knew I'd have bribed a witch for an antidote looong ago."

"…I'm going to die." This time it was Otae who was near to reaching her breaking point, her voice was incredulous, as if she couldn't believe where she was.

Gintoki pretended to be humming thoughtfully. "Should you even be saying something like that?"

Otae's eyes filled with determination. "Listen, Shin-Chan is my little brother and I love him dearly." Then her determination wavered with the cracks in her voice. "…But he is going to kill me one of these days!"

'You mean just like you are daily endangering his life with your cooking skills?' Gintoki wanted to say, but refrained from doing so seeing as he didn't want to die young, no matter if the youth's songs were all about this kind of theme lately, so he kept his mouth shut to avoid an early trip in the afterlife.

Elizabeth was quaking in the corner by now, next to a still unconscious Zaki, showing the same sign over and over again.

_'A bitch is suffering.'_

Sakamoto seemed to be having some sort of effect to Shinpachi's vocal cords too, which was weird because Gintoki had heard that 'nothing ever happens to airheads'- no, wait, that was 'idiots'. But he was both anyway.

"This is…" The man wearing sunglasses indoors was rocking in place back and forth, appearing to be having an epiphany and a breakdown all at once. "…so…" Without finishing what he was about to say, he sprawled himself on the couch, proceeding to fall down in a slow, steady slide, as if his brain was cramping up. He practically melted to the floor, mumbling words no one could quite catch.

"…"

"…"

"Will he be okay?" Katsura asked after a long moment of silence.

"Yeah, he'll be fine." Gintoki shrugged, looking at the puddle of his melted acquaintance (best friend) by their feet. "…Probably.

Given that Sakamoto had taken a seat between Katsura and Gintoki due to his 'best friend' priorities, now that they were 'free' Katsura went to squeeze himself between Elizabeth and Kagura –the girl was now sitting next to the amanto and Yamazaki, begging for something to erase Shinpachi's voice from the deepest recess of her mind, and Elizabeth kept replying with _'I don't have Doraemon's magic pouch, please stop asking this bitch for things' _– and that now left Gintoki to search around the room for his favourite person.

When his eyes landed on him, he patted the spot next to himself with a cheeky smile.

Hijikata got up from his spot between Kondo and Otae – she had practically anchored him to her side to avoid his Commander and while he didn't mind at first, trying to avoid her deadly hits in turn, the ones meant for Kondo, was almost as bad as having to deal with Sougo's daily attempts at his life, not to mention how Kyuubei had somehow started a fight with Kondo too – and with a hint of relief crossing his features he complied almost too quickly.

"You doing okay?" Gintoki teased him right as he sat down.

"Better than you, probably." He teased right back.

"You meanie." The other pretended to pout and Hijikata huffed, letting a small smile take over his face.

Gintoki shifted closer, but did so unconsciously and the raven held his breath for a second. They were so close their knees gently knocked together. It was such a superficial detail, and even so he could feel his skin burn right where their bodies touched.

The heart-wrenching noises coming out of Shinpachi's throat had the upper hand on him for a second, he could swear he heard glass breaking from outside the room when the boy tried to reach what might have been a 'high note'.

"Hey."

But Gintoki's hushed voice was enough to bring his focus back. He inched closer so he could hear him better through the 'singing'. "What?"

"I, uh, you see, uuh, well…" Gintoki seemed to be deeply lost in his own thoughts, fumbling for words as if trying to string together sentences that could make sense.

Hijikata was somehow amused by such a display, after all it wasn't often that he got to witness the man at a loss for words as he often seemed to have a response for everything, including matters that didn't even concern him in the first place- _especially_ those.

"Okay, okay, I guess what I'm trying to say is… that I…" Gintoki was still looking straight ahead, now rubbing the back of his neck in a sort of sheepish way. But Hijikata knew by now that was one of the man's indicators he unconsciously (and rarely) showed when he grew nervous.

"What is it?" He prompted, way beyond curious now.

"…You know." Gintoki finally let past his lips a deep breath he seemed to be holding on to. "You putting yourself through this… _torture,_ just because the kids asked you to, and not even one, but _two _times. So… I guess what I'm trying to say is…" He laughed quietly, properly turning to face him, but instead of the trying expression he wore before, his features had softened now with a smile blooming on his lips. It wasn't wide, or bright, or mischievous. This one was small compared to his usual ones, but what made it stand out was its _sincerity._

"...Thanks for being here."

Hijikata was caught completely off guard, rendered speechless with his breath frozen inside his lungs.

Instead of giving an answer, he abruptly stood up. Without looking back he walked right out of the room in fast strides, disappearing outside.

"What-" Gintoki stared after him, bewildered at the sudden action. A hint of panic seized him from the inside, and with a quick look toward Shinpachi and Kagura to make sure they were okay – yes, they were more than okay, and Kagura seemed to be coping with food – he got up too just as the door closed. "O-Oi, wait!"

He didn't think twice about going after him.

* * *

_**. . .**_

_**A/N: **_

_**There will be a third chapter to this. Of course a third chapter is on the way. Of course.**_

_**It was originally going to be this one only, but in the end it kept getting longer and longer and the part that comes next is almost completely different from this one, so I thought cutting it here would be good enough? Expect something soon-ish?**_

_**Also… don't you just love Tatsuma?!**_


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: This chapter is dedicated to PriorityNaps. I'm sorry this took so long, I wasn't really satisfied with it (and could never find the time to finish it), there's more too, but for now I'll leave it the way it is :) I hope you like it though!**

**. . .**

* * *

**Chapter Three: Can We Always Be This Close?**

* * *

"Toshiro?"

Once outside in the hallway, no doubt deserted due to Shinpachi's (in)ability to sing, it didn't take long for Gintoki to find him.

Hijikata was currently caught in a routine consisting of pacing back and forth, then standing still in place, then muttering words to himself, too quiet to be comprehensible. But at least he wasn't moving away from the corner he had almost hid himself in, making his 'rescue' easier for Gintoki.

"Hey." The silver haired samurai tried again in a softer voice when he reached him.

Hijikata's glare was on him in an instant. "We said we would take things slow!"

Gintoki tilted his head to the side, confused beyond belief since he thought that was exactly what they had been doing up until then. "Yeah… aren't we doing that?"

"No!" The other man denied vehemently, finger accusingly pointed in his direction. "And it's all your fault!"

_"My_ fault?" Gintoki blinked owlishly, taken aback by such a reaction. "Wait, how is it my fault that you walked away after I-" He stopped mid-sentence because realization struck him like a wrecking ball.

_…Oh._

How didn't he figure this out immediately!?

_"Ooh._ I see." The samurai nodded to himself, as if he had somehow uncovered the mystery of the century. A grin, one he really couldn't hold back, slowly took over his face.

"What?" Hijikata asked, frowning at the sudden change in demeanor.

Gintoki's grin came off as a little too _smug_ when he announced out of the blue. "I know what's going on here."

The Vice-Commander's eyes narrowed suspiciously in something between skeptical and concerned. "And what would that be?"

Gintoki lifted his chin up, eyes crinkling at the corners in pleased little crescent moons and Hijikata didn't know if he wanted to slap or kiss that expression off his face, although his pride wouldn't allow him to go for the second option (yet). But before he could do anything about it Gintoki was already elaborating.

"You're freaking out."

A dazed moment of silent surprise went by, one in which Hijikata stared at the man in front of him as if he had grown two heads right before his eyes, utterly confused at the ridiculousness of the statement. He scoffed in disbelief. "What are you talking about? No, I'm not. I-"

But it didn't take long for him to realize so, too.

…Oh.

Gintoki had thanked him. He had _thanked him._ The samurai was not the type of person who said 'thank you' that often and he didn't say it openly… but more importantly he didn't say it to _him_. Not like this. It was usually masked, slipped in words camouflaged as other words, and his gratefulness would hit him only after he left, only when Hijikata had had enough time to decipher the man's coded sentences in his head and understand that he meant _more _than he let on, so _much more._

And Hijikata wasn't _used_ to this kind of openness. Not yet.

After that he had left the room, badly needing some air to collect his scrambled thoughts which were scattered all over the back and forefront of his brain, and like a roller-coaster that wouldn't stop its course his stomach kept dropping, making his insides feel upside down and inside out. And this only because Gintoki had actually said _'thanks' _out loud, no hidden secret message, no walls between them.

And that had apparently been a _little too much_ to handle because now…

_Shit._

"…I'm freaking out." He admitted in a barely audible voice, though it was mostly to himself.

"It's okay." For all his smugness, Gintoki _did_ take a step towards him, he even placed his hands over his shoulders in reassurance. (Even if it _still_ sounded like he was making fun of him, just a little.)

"Shut up." Hijikata drew back defensively, trying to cling to the last threads of denial he could grasp. "And get that stupid smile off your face."

Gintoki's _stupid_ smile widened more. "No can do, _baby."_

"…Shut up." He repeated in what sounded a clearly defeated tone now. "And stop with that." He added sourly, still trying to pretend he was immune to his choice of wording.

After a pause both men spent to make order in their thoughts (one more than the other)…

"Alright." Gintoki proceeded to put his hands on his own waist, giving off a sort of mother-hen vibe with his _'we're going to solve this right now'_ expression. "Sit."

"…What?" Hijikata asked in bewilderment.

"C'mon, sit down." Gintoki urged.

The Vice-Commander dropped his gaze to the floor, where no doubt a thousand feet had stepped over, and a sliver of disgust made its way across his face. "No."

"Why not?"

"'Cause it's dirty." He replied flatly, stating the obvious.

Gintoki raised a brow, puzzled. "So, who cares?"

"Certainly not you." Hijikata muttered with a scoff.

Gintoki rolled his eyes. "Oh, fine, I'll buy you a stupid new uniform if you're so desperate to keep the 'germs' away."

(Not that it was 'stupid' by any mean, he liked the Shinsengumi's uniform on Hijikata, _a lot_… it probably wouldn't even be considered legal how much he _liked_ Hijikata in it… but no one really needed to know _that._)

The Vice-Chief was the one to roll his eyes this time. "With what money?"

"I'll take some from the Gorilla." At the warning look he received, he raised his hands in mock surrender. "Just kidding, just kidding." _Not really._ "Now, can we do this so we can get back to Shinpachi breaking our eardrums?" But after a moment of taking _that _under consideration… "...Actually, if you want to stay here and sulk some more that's fine by me."

"I'm not sulking!" Hijikata denied in frustration, dropping his gaze down again. With a small amount of hesitation as he barely bit back on an exasperated sigh, in the end he relented.

"Sure you aren't." Gintoki followed suit, without bothering to hide a triumphant grin.

Cross-legged on the floor of the karaoke parlor, they sat facing each other. Their kneecaps were brushing, just like before on the couch, and somehow the contact was enough to ease the dark haired man of the tight knot inside of him.

Gintoki's eyes, half-filled with mirth, softened the longer he looked at him, making him slowly reach for one of his hands, holding it in his and above their folded knees before he decided to voice his thoughts.

"You know, it's happened to me too." It slightly stung to admit this, but with time he had learnt that admitting something to _someone_ and admitting something to _Hijikata_ were two completely _different _things. And he didn't really mind the latter, especially if it could be of some use to the situation. "Still happens, actually."

Hijikata's eyes, which had been trained on their hands, flickered up to meet his. "…When?"

"Don't you remember that day your dear Commander invited us at the barracks?" Gintoki smiled a little at the memory despite himself.

After a few seconds of searching for that precise moment inside his head, Hijikata's lips lifted with the hint of a smile in remembrance. "…Yeah." He even went as far as letting out a quiet chuckle. "Thought you were going to tear down the whole place at one point."

"Hey, that wasn't my fault! I thought he was gonna marry us right then and there, let a man freak out in peace!" Gintoki snapped, feeling riled up at the mention only.

Hijikata snorted, Kondo had made it rather… _official. _Way too official. He had not even known his Commander knew about them until that day. And to think he and Gintoki were both _more than good_ at keeping secrets, but there was no real secrets that could escape their friends it seemed.

Gintoki _did_ actually have a major freak out session back then, 'major' as in due to unfortunate circumstances he ended up destroying half of the barracks, though it was accidental. He had done it all on his own too, and even if Hijikata wouldn't say this to him he had been rather impressed.

"Do you remember what you told me after that?" The silver haired man continued, grasping his other hand too and gently stroking his thumbs over the cold and slightly damp skin, which was starting to warm up in his hold.

"Don't touch the alcohol because Sougo poisoned it?" Hijikata tried.

"No." Gintoki took a moment to think about it. "Would have been nice if you had told me before I drank it, though.

Another one of the unfortunate circumstances involved rat poison, courtesy of Sougo and one of his 'mild' attempts to get rid of Hijikata. The small quantity of poison was not deadly by any mean and only one glass would have sufficed for his superior to manifest the symptoms – contrary to popular belief Sougo might be a little shit, but he wasn't _cruel_\- however, in his haste to chase away the tempestuous feelings brought on by a _ceremony, _Gintoki had been on the receiving end of said attack when he accidentally drank from Hijikata's still untouched glass. Then ended up drinking the whole bottle too.

When Sougo had noticed, it had been too late to warn him- the kid did feel guilty he had second-handedly put Gintoki in such a situation- and that resulted in a trip to the hospital only to be bed-ridden for a few days. Bright side was their 'wedding' got interrupted at least.

(Not that Gintoki didn't want to marry Hijikata- God knew how badly he fantasized about it- but it had to be on _their own time and terms, _after all it was only a few weeks since they started dating.)

"In the hospital, remember what you told me in that hospital room?"

Gintoki remembered mostly bits and pieces from that certain event, but something still clear in his head was how he had asked Hijikata to go, seeing as he was losing precious work days to be by his side. Moreover Gintoki wasn't really a fan of being seen at his worst, not that anyone really was, but 'worst' for him had meant being completely out of it most of the time, throwing up in the span of a few hours more than he had done in his lifetime and saying things he would probably never repeat out loud to a living soul. But Hijikata hadn't left, not even then.

Gintoki's voice thickened with his smile when he repeated his lover's words. "'I won't go even if the doctor walks right in and tells me I have to push a fist down your stomach to every bit of poison out of you. There's no chance in hell of me walking out that door now, you hear me? Because we're in this…'"

"'…together.'" Hijikata finished quietly, now with a proper smile hanging by his lips.

"Yeah." Gintoki was looking at him as if he was something irreplaceable, something he couldn't live without anymore. "That's what you said."

Hijikata's hands lost their rigidity, and so did his posture, finally letting go of the tension that had built up and threatened to slowly suffocate him. And letting Gintoki bring inside him this sort of easiness that never ceased to make him lower his defences. His hands, laying pliant before in the other man's hold, gripped tighter now, squeezing back.

Gintoki's soft smile had a hint of something delightful and mischievous in it. "To this day that still is the most _romantically disgusting_ thing anyone has ever said to me. I was thinking of having that quote framed, hang it on the wall right where everyone can see it-"

Hijikata averted his eyes with an amused huff. "Shut it."

He could feel the imprint of a grin on the back of his hand when Gintoki brought it to his lips, and though the action made his face feel _unbearably_ hot, it made every single part of him colour in this shade of lightness that made everything feel so much _easier_ than it really was.

"Wait, _wait_, how do you even remember that with all the drugs you were on?" He suddenly asked, looking at Gintoki with a mixture of skepticism and wonder since the man had practically been stuffed with medication at one point.

"I remember your smile in that moment. Made me feel like I was floating in heaven." Gintoki answered against his skin, never losing his grin. "And everything connected to it."

Hijikata didn't even try to suppress an exasperated groan, almost hiding his face in their joined hands. "…How can you even say things like these while sober?"

Gintoki snickered like a little kid. "I just like the idea of embarrassing you so much that I really don't mind embarrassing myself in the process too."

"You're horrible, you know that?"

"Oh, I _know."_

Hijikata's gaze got side-tracked, from Gintoki's flashing _red_ in his eyes, to the slightly _red_ flush of his paler complexion, to the _red_ warmth of his pale hands around his own, and he swore he could feel his heart pounding in his ears to the rhythm of Gintoki's thumbs stroking the skin of his palms. It was messing with his head, but everything about him did.

"…You're not playing fair." More than an accusation it was a statement, as if Hijikata had already given up.

Gintoki slowly brought his hands to his own cheeks, covering the back of Hijikata's hands with his own palms and when he spoke again his voice was so quiet it almost got lost inside the silent emptiness they found themselves in the middle of.

"I never really liked playing fair, Toshiro. You should know that by now." Though Gintoki's words were uttered to poke fun, his gaze was the _opposite_, as soft as it had ever been, and it was all for _him_. It made something inside Hijikata crack, just a _little_.

"You…" Hijikata started, barely breathing through the fog in his mind trying to chase after the words. "You can't just… thank-" He stopped himself, rewording. "You can't say… _that."_

Gintoki tilted his head to the side, only slightly, eyes shining with something unreadable and much too warm. "Can't I say it to you?"

The way he was asking it, almost as if he was asking for permission to let _him_ see pieces of himself he never let anyone else see.

Hijikata closed his eyes at the sweetness of it _all_, feeling like it was all going to ruin him somehow.

(This man was really going to kill him someday.)

But if Gintoki was doing it then he thought he could bare pieces of his soul for him to see, too.

"Idiot." His hands went limp and his own eyes softened. His voice dropped down to a whisper with the efforts of trying to encompass _everything _these days together had meant in a single question. "…shouldn't I be the one thanking you?"

The moment was frozen in time, a small eternity encompassed them with the weight of the words (and feelings they brought on) still hanging in the air.

"…Fuck." Gintoki cursed softly, his grip on Hijikata's hands tightened even if he lowered his head, hiding his expression. "Don't do this to me."

Hijikata looked at him puzzled and slightly startled. "What?"

_"This."_ When Gintoki's eyes lifted to his, something was shining in them, making his stare almost angry. "Who's the one not playing fair now?"

It dawned on him then, if the roles were reversed Gintoki might have had his _same reaction_. It wasn't difficult just for Hijikata, he wasn't the only one who had to go through this… Gintoki did too. His own words rung inside his head again, they were in this _together._

Feeling relieved at the realization he let out a heavy sigh, his lips curving up in the semblance of a smirk. "Might have picked up a few of your tricks."

Gintoki scoffed quietly, averting his gaze to the side, though the red dusted on his cheeks was ever present.

"As I said, this is all…" Feeling more confident, Hijikata leaned in, until they were a hair's breath away. "…your fault."

Gintoki turned to him with a smile, all soft and edgeless and so _so_ endearingly _wonderful_. "Fuck you."

Hijikata smiled back, feeling all sorts of relieved and glad and _wonderful_. "Fuck you too."

But as Gintoki kept drawing towards him, he put a few inches of distance between them, leaning on the wall behind him. He almost chuckled at the childish pout he received in turn, but he had decided to be open and he wanted to do so 'til the end, and Gintoki's lips would be far too _distracting _to let him think clearly.

"It's just so… " Hijikata began, his voice felt far too loud to his own ears and he hesitated again, trying to explain as best as he could, trying to find the right way to say things he _wanted _to say, even if he felt like talking things through had never somehow been one of his stronger points. In the end he settled for what he thought was his best shot. _"New_."

Gintoki's smile was both impish and syrupy. "I know." And he did _know. _He knew exactly and terribly and so _overwhelmingly_ well just what Hijikata meant. "It's new for me too."

Hijikata nodded with his head cast down, thinking of what else to say.

"But…" Gintoki continued, surprising him.

Their gazes met again, Hijikata's questioning. "But?"

Gintoki moved in, erasing inch by inch between them, until their foreheads were grazing and their line of vision was filled with nothing but the pigments of colours making up each other's eyes.

"I'm starting to get used to you."

It was as if the breath was punched out of Hijikata's lungs, and he had never been happier about it. The irrational panic-induced-_thinking_ dissipated truly and completely, leaving his body in crashing waves until there was nothing left but a _warm_ and _familiar_ kind of rush buzzing beneath his skin, one that he knew only Gintoki could make him feel.

And suddenly he _understood_.

"…I think I'm getting used to you too." He also confessed.

Gintoki's beaming smile could have lit up the whole building. "I lov-"

But before he could finish, Hijikata had practically _slapped _a hand over his mouth. "Don't you dare!"

"-hmph?"

"Don't you dare drop the L-bomb on me right now!" He snapped menacingly, eyes slit in a fierce glare (although the effect was greatly dimmed by his flaming cheeks).

"Hmph- !" Gintoki snorted amused behind his hand, taking it away from his mouth and once again in his own. "Oh c'mon, it's not like this is the first time we're saying it."

But Hijikata wouldn't have it. Being thanked and told he is loved in the _same_ day? No, no, _no! _This freak out session was enough to last him for a lifetime, he didn't need to add another to his list. "I don't care! You're not allowed to do it now! What about the rules?!"

"What rules?"

_"_The_ rules!"_ Hijikata declared, like that made perfect sense.

Gintoki's answering sigh was verging on exasperation. "Alright, we've talked about this already… if you make up rules in your head how do you expect other people to follow them?"

Hijikata almost gaped, affronted. "You're the one who makes up rules!"

"Look, I didn't mean to borrow that car-"

"You s_tole _it."

"Whatever, it happened years ago."

"It was _three weeks ago_ you moron!"

"How dare you call the love of your life something so _awful?!"_

"Funny how that describes you so _perfectly!"_

"You idiot-!"

They go from sharing a vulnerable piece of themselves to… wrestling. But this happens to all the couples when they sit and talk things thoroughly and _seriously..._ right?

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

"I won!" Gintoki screamed his triumph with much more enthusiasm than required, watching Hijikata from atop his metaphorical throne. "Eat my dust now!"

"You cheated!" Hijikata yelled back, practically livid at being bested in such a common activity – they often wrestled, be it from excessive bickering or just for the fun of it, usually Gintoki initiated it and he also used every trick up his sleeve. "You're a cheater!"

"Oh?" Gintoki's cocky smirk made him appear bulletproof. "And what are you going to do about that dear Fukucho? Have me arrested?"

Hijikata's eyes narrowed in annoyance. "I should."

"Soichiro-Kun wouldn't let you." The silver haired man's face split in half with a victorious grin. "I'm his favourite, remember?"

The Vice-Commander rolled his eyes, not able to deny such an obvious truth. "I hate you both."

Gintoki gave him an appeasing grin, making Hijikata raise a brow in question. "Now, this is a change in position from last time." He said out of the blue.

Only then did Hijikata notice their current state, with him lying on the floor (he had not even wanted to sit on it before and now he didn't mind literally _lying_ on it) and Gintoki almost crawling on top of him. He was reminded of the last time they had been here, their positions reversed, but that of course did nothing to lessen the heat he felt his face filling with. He tried his hardest to ignore it.

"If you say so." He mumbled around a shrug, making Gintoki chuckle.

In the silence that followed, they noticed a slow song playing nearby, just barely audible and coming through one of the half opened doors. Strangely enough it was as if the melody was setting out the scene, the mellow notes in sync with their breathing and creating a rhythm of their own.

Gintoki's grin slowly dissolved like snow in the spring, leaving a soft kind of glow to his expression. His face was hovering above Hijikata's now. His eyes appeared darker from such a short distance, reflecting into his own, it was as if they were relentlessly searching for a sign. And when he finally found what he was looking for his expression opened up with a small, barely seen smile.

"Let me kiss you." It wasn't a question, but the intonation of his voice almost made it sound so.

Hijikata's lungs could barely fill with enough air, and to think Gintoki was capable of having this effect on him with the use of a few, simple words.

The answer was a nod, a small tilt of his head that held no traces of hesitation.

It was so silent he could hear the sound their breaths made, so _loud _to his own ears it almost masked the heartbeats he could feel pounding away in his head. Their noses brushed first and the _tenderness_ of the gesture made something _ache_ deep within him, craving for this kind of unfamiliar affection- unfamiliar until Gintoki had introduced him to it.

Before their lips even touched, he could already feel the weight of the kiss.

There was a dry warmth that spread inside of him, from his mouth, to his chest, to his fingertips, to his entire body, wherever it could reach, and he could feel himself falling further into the feeling.

His hands found purchase in Gintoki's clothes, and he tugged, trying to pull him impossibly closer because in that moment he really didn't want to be able to tell where he ended and Gintoki began. He could already feel his head spinning with every stroke of lips to lips and it was slowly making him lose sight of anything else that wasn't _him_.

The taste on his tongue was unsurprisingly sweet, almost overwhelmingly so, but he was so used to it by now he only found himself coming back for more, craving it. He had never fathomed having a sweet crave- not before Gintoki.

It felt like an eternity and a single second when they broke apart, and still it was much too soon.

Hijikata opened his eyes to the dazzling sight of familiar red dusting Gintoki's cheekbones and his heartbeat didn't show signs of slowing down anytime soon. But he had the impression he had never felt better in his life.

"…Again?" He asked with a hint of eagerness, feeling only _slightly _out of it.

Gintoki's blinding smile was enough to make a small sun burn inside of his heart.

"Again." He confirmed, capturing his mouth with his own.

Their bodies aligned, shadows merging into a single one.

The kiss was different this time, still yielding its softness but so sweet in its demanding intensity, even if there was no rush but for the rush sizzling inside their veins.

He tried to draw a breath in but Gintoki greedily swallowed it in his mouth, as if it was his own oxygen he was breathing.

Hijikata teased a thumb across his skin, raking gentle nails over his sensitive nape just to feel Gintoki shiver above him, panting quietly and muffled and hot in his mouth, making him smile almost unconsciously. The taste on his tongue was getting sweeter the harder he chased it down, trying to memorize the seam of his lips with his own until it almost hurt.

If he felt like boiling before, he now felt scorching heat wherever their skin came in contact. And it only spurred him on to get _closer_.

It felt so _right._

Hijikata had the three little words imprinted inside his chest, burning with the need to get out. He wanted to whisper them back to Gintoki, but he couldn't even fathom leaving the softness of his lips for a second. Instead he kissed the words into his mouth, trying to say them in the press of their lips, hoping he would understand. From the way Gintoki gasped, gripping at him, drawing him in until there was no more physical space between them, Hijikata thought he had understood.

All he could see was whitewashed silver invading the space between his eyes and the space between his mind and body, making him feel like he was floating whenever he was around him, never coming back down. An irrational part inside of him was so afraid his heart could burst from this, a feeling so unknown before now (was this what people called happiness?).

He could feel Gintoki's heart thundering where their torsos pressed together and Hijikata wondered if the other could feel his own, because his heart was pounding so hard it was _bruising_ the inside of his chest.

He ran his fingers through his hair and watched the bright spots of light behind his eyelids go wild, growing dizzy by the second with the softness his fingers had sunk in.

It was a bit of a mess, with their hands roaming and their lips reaching every inch of skin they could find and their bodies moving, as if they could get burnt if they stuck motionlessly in one place for too long.

When he opened his eyes he found Gintoki's below him (when had they changed positions?) and he couldn't hold himself back from ghosting his fingertips along the corner of the man's mouth, lips pulsing, shining bright red.

He tenderly brushed back dishevelled curls with his other hand. Gintoki's pupils were blown wide, swallowing the scarlet rings in their darkness and Hijikata reveled in the fact that _he_ was the c_ause _of this.

"…One more time?" Gintoki asked, sounding the perfect shade of breathless and eager and _wrecked._

He tried and failed to suppress a chuckle, because he was feeling exactly the way Gintoki was _looking. _"One more time."

Hijikata pressed his half-smile to Gintoki's one, molding their halves into a perfect whole.

* * *

** . . .**

**A/N:**

**A few things:**

**-**_**CAN YOU FEEL THE FLUFF TONIIIIIGHT?**_

**-This is /INCOMPLETE/**

** This chapter alone was 10k but I cut down a lot of it. The complete story will be out in 'If I Could Say What I Want To Say' in the future, for now this is it, but I'll add another chapter with the other characters around January or so.**

**-I wanted to add about the other pairings too, but I honestly just wanted this to be exclusively about Gintoki and Hijikata in the end, so this happened...?**

**\- "I'm starting to get used to you."**

**"...I think I'm getting used to you too."**

**These were absolutely two of my favorite sentences I have ever written on any story ever. I'm just so happy I had the idea to write them in this chapter :,)**

**-I'm taking a small break from everything Gintama-related so MERRY early CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE! I hope you have a fantastic one! Remember to drink a lot of hot chocolate! SEE YOU ALL IN THE NEW YEAR!**


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